rose blue

feeling a little blue today....

perhaps it's the skies, or it's being surrounded by a couple of hundreds of fifteen and sixteen year olds... all hyped up in a camp. nothing like being wrapped in people and noise to emphasize one being all alone...

it's the kind of time, when one has the epiphanies which are of no use at all...

nearing thirty years and nothing to show but for a good dose of cynicism and disillusionment...it's not a pretty place to be in.

read something recently that made me question my so-called ethical values and all that I thought I believed in. a couple of things that happened recently also made me wonder about my moral values or lack thereof.

I remember a time when I believed in absolutes and also believed in not believing in absolutes. both at the same time.

good and bad,right and wrong, true and false.

it's either or and nothing in between at all.

it's either there or not or it's invisible and hanging in the air.

it's black or white and the rainbow of colors in between.

I'm not the same person I was one second ago. the things I believe in changing with every millisecond.

I'm not the person I thought I would be one second ago either.

there are different definitions of absolutes and ways of going to extremes.

we see life in facets. and the blind spots enables us to ignore the facets that we do not see. despite their undeniable existence

and why does it matter?

the skies blushed rose during dusk.