Taiwan

Back from Taiwan…. Really enjoyed the week of backpacking with P…hostels and different itineraries every day… Missed these days of travel that we did in Europe which was 2 years ago already… P still remembered the strains of songs we created during the Europe days… traveling in the states just isn’t the same when we had permanent “homes”.

Spent 4 days in Tainan and 3 days in Taipei… Deliberately did this so that we’ll have more days in the country… Stayed in a Home-stay owned by a couple and it was like staying with their family. So very homey, complete with picking up their two kids everyday from school and playing with the kids at night. The couple was very warm and welcoming… The dad was also our personal guide and chauffer for the four days, bringing us to different sights everyday and ensuring that we get the full Tainan experience, from lotus blossom fields to the bamboo groves and tea fields mountains to the seaside coastal areas of oyster and salt fields… Different landscape every single day….It made our entire trip much easier and way more informative… and we had an experience of a kind of the lives of the people there…

First day was a rainy day… we went to GuanZi Ling… visited two ancient temples and had a free vegetarian lunch at one of the temples… it was a quiet day… the calming sense of old temples and the light drizzle…

We visited the lotus blossoms the second day… the reason we came to Tainan… because it’s the lotus and water lilies season… fields and fields of pink and white lotus in bloom and fragrant water lilies of every color with the backdrop of gold rice fields… Had a chance to pick the water lilies and drink the flower essence as well. Did the famous Guan Zi Ling mud hot springs and spa at night… so comfy…. Also went up to see the night lights after…

Went to Xi Tou Mountains the third day. It’s a mountain with tea fields at the top and covered in bamboo groves… We actually visited the tea fields owned by friends of our host family… so its not a tourist sight and we had the place all to ourselves… at the top of the mountains with a breathtaking view of tea fields and cloud-covered mountains…. With only the tea pickers in sight… it was ethereal…..

Last day was spent by the sea…. Took a ferry out to see how oysters are grown and harvested before barbequing fresh oysters… naturally salted by the salty sea water and so sweet by itself… attempted to climb a salt mountain afterwards which is much harder than we thought… the salt was loose and slippery and the also coarse and rough on the hands… wanted to give up halfway but two guys that already attempted the climb twice (they wanted to try to climb the mountain from different sides !?! ) told us to try and climbed up again behind us to support us. The view on top of the salt fields and fish ponds surrounded the area was worth it, but the sense of satisfaction is even better. We slid our way down, thankful that our jeans were thick enough : )

There are other little things as well… catching fireflies at night… visiting a cow farm and drinking milk freshly squeezed… a gorgeous sunset over a lake created by a dam… a Chatres-like hostel area of a local university… overall Tainan is a beautiful place…

The quiet and country pace of Tainan made us unused to the bustle and polluted air of Taipei… which is perhaps why we didn’t really like the city all that much… although we had happy memories of Shilin Night Market (where we spent out first night before taking the train to Tainan… loved the yummy foods and the relaxed atmosphere of the teahouse where we spent an hour sipping tea and listening to music). Spent our second night at Xi Meng Ting shopping… bought a sports bag that I have been looking for forever and clothes… Spent 3 hours in Eslite Bookstore (I love that bookstore!)… would have stayed longer if not for P complaining…

Escaped to Yang Ming Shan the next day…Trekked up to JuanSi waterfalls and Qing Tian Gang Grasslands…. It was a easy trek under the cooling green canopy and with a soundtrack of rushing spring waters… QingTian Gang is an amazingly rolling grasslands of several scenic tops with a cooling breeze… but the next trek up to Seven Stars Garden and Dream Lake wasn’t as easy… it was a killing trek up steep, crumbling steps under the hot noon sun… but the view is breathtaking… Trekked across the mountain to the other side of Yang Ming Shan before doing another hot spring and taking the bus down to the city… went to Sun Yat Sen Memorial Hall which is like one huge community centre… P couldn’t believe his eyes when a father and son holding badminton rackets walked in to the square and proceeded to play badminton right in front of us in on the road! Had dinner at Ding Tai Fung… the original store brimming with customers and a long queue.

Last day was spent at the Palace Museum and its amazing collection depicting the development of pottery glazing and various fine arts… went to Taipei Story House after that… a cute little house with a changing exhibition and this time it happened to be one on Wu Xia, my fave topic!

Overall, it was a wonderful week… tiring yes, but fulfilling too… and it made us feel like young students again…

I would do it again...

I would do it again. I would kill, destroy, maim – and I would love you anyway.

Don’t. Don’t say that. You can’t. You can’t have both.

Oh, but don’t you see. I already do.


These few lines…..they haunt me. They circle in my head again and again…

little memories of happiness

I’m a terribly unorganized and untidy person. Anyone who has seen my room or my office table can attest to that. I’m also the kind that refuses to throw anything away, thinking of them as mementoes that are keepers and proofs of memories in my life. It accounts for a lot of rubbish, but occasionally, every now and then, I find it so true and worth it… little moments in life that I will be madly searching through my bags for a misplaced ezy-link card and come across a mini-calendar-card-sized Manhattan subway map that I stuck in the hidden corner of a bag back in June when I was in New York….or picking up a bag that I haven’t used for ages and opening the front pocket to find ancient trans-island yellow bus tickets that reminded me of a time when P used to fold hearts out of these little bits of paper… combing through my wallet for cash only to come across faded cinema tickets that remind me of both the film and the friend I watched it with…sifting through my piles of paper to uncover a note written by a best friend that somehow got stuck there (probably when said friend helped my clean up my desk!)….digging into the pocket of a jacket to bring out a foreign coin I stuck there once when overseas… little memories of happiness and the little moment when I happen across these little bits of proofs allow me to relive the times…and I know its worth it… to live with all the clutter and the insanity of searching through everything madly to find whatever it is I need buried under everything and anything every single time… for these little moments of surprises and never knowing when I’m going to happen across a happy memory….

Bintan

Had three divine days in Bintan.... Beautiful beaches, clear waters and the softest white sands imaginable and the greenest tropical trees for a contrast… and a lovely horizon where the skies and seas dissolved into each other…

Idyllic days… a blissful three hour spa on the first day… such indulgence… loved the room with all the rustic touches and the heavenly scent and a view of the beach. I could sit there and sip sunflower tea all day…

Did water-skiing and jetski the second morning. Water-skiing was fun, the adrenaline rush and the feel of flying on water… but jet-skis beats it hands down with the pure speed and easy fun! It’s like motorcycle on water with the additional benefit of accelerating all the way.

Spent the day relaxing by the swimming pool with a book and ice-cream and dips in the pool when it got warm… and P buzzing around my ears all afternoon like a mosquito without a book to entertain him :p

Went for a walk along the beach… climbed the rocks for a view of breakers crashing against the rock… and walked from one point of the beach to the other.. the waves crashing around our bare feet… and sun glittering on the sea… picked up two pieces of coral with intricate designs… Went for a swim at sunset…swam towards the setting sun with the warmth of the sun rays on my back…

It was a wonderful three days and two nights of being pampered and looked after…felt like a princess…

Greece

Finally finished arranging my Greece Photos … brought me a trip down memory lane, seeing as it’s been five years since the trip (see how much I procrastinate!)

Greece will always have a special place in my heart… its one of the places I visit and actually want to return and stay forever (Switzerland and Boston are the only two other places). Love the isles and the Aegean, Mykonos with its gentle allure of blue and white calming spirit and Santorini with its irresistible fiery volcanic beauty… the windmills and clear waters and the glitter of the cities at the edge of the cliffs….Love wandering about Athens… never knowing if you are going to happen on one of the historical archeological sites buried under the city…living among the ancient civilization…with the Acropolis in view whenever you lift your head…

I just want to go back…

last day of school

Just finished packing… the staff room is a mad, mad place… open boxes and huge, black trash bags all over the place and blocking the already congested narrow passageways and towers piled precariously on top of each other. The high-pitch shriek of tearing tape can be heard the entire day together with laughter and moans as we perform acrobatic acts of hopping over the open boxes and avoid stepping into trash bags… of how we managed to accumulate so much trash and how we wish we can sweep everything one-handed into the trash bags… and how we again managed to pack something we need right now into a box already taped close… and naturally, we will not, even at the risk of gunpoint, open a box we have packed full and taped close which is naturally at the bottom of our tower of boxes anyway (Yes, I'm exaggerating)…

For a last day of term, chaos is perfectly normal as usual.

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My life has been full of newspapers recently. It included the trouble-strewn sec. 1 newspaper collections in which my kids brought newspapers on the wrong day and culminating to yesterday where they went all around the school in a one-day-garang guni attempt to collect at least 200 kg of newspaper and actually managing to collect more than 300 kg, earning the school 30 dollars…. The class was a mess of recycled paper the day before the newspaper collections… and my sec. 3 classes said they were missing newspapers due to the over-eager collectors. :p My kids can really do things when they put their heart to it… like the classroom cleaning… after a lot of nagging, the class was sparkling clean… floor mopped, tables wiped and all the corners wiped free of dust.. am so proud of them. Will be bringing P to the class barbeque on the 8^th, looking forward to their reaction :p

Also spent the past few days chasing after my Sec. 3 kids for way overdue newspaper cuttings… I actually really don't care but as the newspaper cuttings are compulsory to all, I have to do it. Spent the last day of school marking their newspaper comprehensions and ordering them to read newspapers at least once a week to build up their current affairs knowledge…

Actually feel quite hypocritical every time I tell my kids that they have to read newspapers… because I don't do it myself! For someone that gets her current affairs updates from reading Mr. Brown's blog every once in a blue moon (and marking my students' newspaper cuttings), I'm not a very good person for encouraging religious newspaper readings…

In fact, I remember back when I was a fresh 'A' level grad deciding which scholarship to pick up, upon hearing my decision to do the teaching scholarship, my ex-CL teacher said, "Are you sure? CL teachers have to read a lot of Chinese newspapers leh." Ha. She knows me best.

Despite her warnings, I still chose the teaching scholarship. And so here I am now. Force-feeding newspaper readings on students and not reading newspapers myself…but the newspapers reading are so necessary for the exams… without reading newspapers and going for exams is like going out shopping without money… but they so don't understand…

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Last day of school…. my desk is empty…. Going out dancing tonight….

first teaching anniversary

Today marks the first year anniversary of teaching… and I almost didn't remember. If not for the alarm I set a long time ago… it would have passed by without a ripple in my teaching life… Running up and down… scolding students for matters ranging from breaking the fluorescent tube by playing ball to not collecting enough newspapers… settling matters like their class outing and confiscating Da Vinci Code from students reading illegally in my class…It's a day just like another.

Still. It's been a year. Congratulations to myself.

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Went for a course yesterday and skipped a day of school. Kept falling asleep though, am so tired. Only woke up for the discussions. The instructor played a movie at the end of the course and said it wasn't compulsory to stay behind… naturally, most people left. I was one of the three that stayed behind… partly because I felt bad, partly because the show left an impression. Remembering the Titans, it was a film more on the segregation between the whites and black than on team cohesion, still, it was no less inspirational. When Gerry met with the accident and Julius visited him, his answer to the nurse's statement of only kin is allowed is simply heartbreakingly true.

For a film that handles racial segregation and harmony issues, Remembering the Titans is definitely way more idealistic than Crash, despite being a true story. But sometimes, instead of handling the issues in a way that uses thought-provoking pain, films that give us hope might not leave a stronger impact, but it does give us a reason to try…

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Term's ending… although it doesn't feel like it. I don't feel the sense of finality or relief. Not to say that I do at any end of term week. Work is still piled up and continues to pile as I type… Looking forward to the holidays though, especially for Bintan… three days of relaxing, with nothing more stressful than waking up late and lazing by the beach… swimming in the sea and ache-releasing spas…. Three days of not thinking of anything but what to eat for dinner…in fact, I'm not going to think about that either, P can decide. ….Three days of heaven…

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Went for drinks with Lin last Sat as I was feeling moody…. I actually hate the taste of alcohol. But I just wanted to not think. Turned out it didn't really work. Went to two places, the lounge at Ritz recced by Gab, and Postbar at the Fullerton . Only had three drinks but I already felt dizzy and threw up. A bartender was so worried that she held my hand all the way to the toilet and pushed a mug of warm lime water to Lin to make me drink when I didn't return to the bar after. Lin was amazing… she took care of me all night, entertaining my whims and tantrums and took me home when it appeared that I shouldn't drink anymore… I don't remember all that I've said except that it was probably very embarrassing and nonsensical and she stayed with me all the way and through the night… She said she's never seen me so upset in all our years of friendship and I'm long overdue for a breakdown… I don't know, all I know is that I hope I can snap out of this mood soon…. And I'm incredibly lucky to have Lin….

Despondency

Haven't updated for what feels like forever but turns out to be only roughly one month. This is so not good… bad, bad behavior.

Let's see… news of the month… my wushu kids did really well, most got quite a good ranking and it's was a very good experience for them. One of them did miraculously well and won a gold medal! She beat 20 other pple that trained for years even though she only trained for 2 months. Quite proud of them, for a first time, its quite a achievement.

Marking season came and went together with its days and nights of hell-froze-over-nothing-is-more-important-than-non-stop-marking…

Watched a number of plays… but somehow all seems rather blurry in my mind now except for a very simple production of Dogs Barking at a obscure corner of this little island that I've never been before. The acting was okay and the set was good but the play itself was unexpectedly provoking… the ideas of how people and emotions change and yet essentially do not… unspeakable stuff that we are capable of doing to those we once loved and still do love… I especially liked the way it ended with a short look at the way it all once started… we forget sometimes… that we were the ones that hurt ourselves in the beginning… but who can blame us? Was crying at the bus stop after the play… somehow it touched a part of me that I didn't expect…

Other shows include Burn the Floor (quality dancing), A Very British Affair (a fun night out with lots of laugh although the singing really quite sucks compared to real Broadway) and others that blurs in my mind now…

A top news recently would be the scary dental operation I underwent… with needles and thread and scissors and drills waving all over my face and a half numb jaw plus five days of porridge in which I naturally crave my Ruffles chips… all in exchange for taking out two wisdom teeth. It all seems so not worthwhile… Teeth are still numb.

Been taking turns class recently…. And conclusion is that a lot more classes are needed before I can do my turns… Haven't danced for a long time due to the operation and won't be dancing again this week as I'm watching Man of Letters on Friday with Gabriel…

Haiz… been very moody recently… nothing seems to get my spirits up and nothing makes me happy… even the news barely have anything happy in it…

爱玫瑰

在听周华健的“爱玫瑰“。听到一句“爱在十七是完美，怎么都不会累，他吻了我的额头让我无法入睡 “。带回了许多回忆。与其说回忆，不如说感觉。十七岁时的爱情，什么都甜美。似乎没有什么比之更重要。每天都为之开心或伤心得无法入睡。只在乎感觉。那么 的天真，单纯。相比下，现在的爱情，成熟，疲惫。考虑的东西之多，已远远超过当时简单的感觉。

“爱在你眼中是谁？会不会有玫瑰？“
我的爱情没有玫瑰，有的是百合与薰衣草。还有一个北京夜晚，我漫步回宿舍时买的满天星。虽然不是他送的，但我记得，那时我一手抱着满天星，一手握着手机和他讲话，心中的喜悦有他陪我分享。

他很久没送我花了。因为慢慢发现，花儿凋谢时的伤感已渐渐胜过收到花儿的喜悦，因此告诉他别再送了。有心就好。（而且新加坡的花比北京的贵太多了）

不知为何，忽然间很想收到一束满天星。简单，单纯。

scrambled thoughts

April 9th. Today is a special day because of a promise made.

Suddenly, everything is seen through different light… nothing changes but everything changes… essentially…

Its funny how everything happens on the 9th for us… hopefully it really means something ...

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On another note, yesterday was the translation competition. I’m so proud of my kids! They actually got into the finals ^_^ I really didn’t expect them to get in despite all my threats. I know, its only 4th, but 4 out of 79 teams means a great deal. And they really did very well and stood up under some very tough competition. I know that they are still upset with the results (they were so close!) but I’m really very proud of them already. All those training sessions were really worth it. They were quite disappointed when they knew that the trophy and prize money were all going straight to the school, so I treated them to lunch at Sakae after. I’ll miss them with the end of weekly training sessions… (and they were talking about celebrating their freedom!)

One down, five more competition days to go… hope my wushu kids do as well …

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Next two weeks will be hell with the afternoons all taken up and marking undone… Chinese orals for the first week and Wushu competitons the second. Still there’s Good Friday to look forward to. Treating Shimei for a pedicure and going for a play after on Sat. And may be meeting up with my favorite aunt for her birthday on Fri itself.

Also will be meeting JX. Both of us have been making plans to meet up since mid-March and the planned dinner never materialized… Its like “Why are you so busy???” and “Why are YOU so busy???” right back between the both of us... finally set a date on the 17th which both of us die die will make it for…

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April is my theatre month (I seem to have theatre months every alternate months! Watched numerous plays in Feb and none in Jan and March. Watching numerous plays in April and none in May. Already bought 4 tickets for June coz it’s the Arts Fest and none as yet for July… hmm. Weird coincidence?)

Watched A Language of Their Own by checkpoint theatre and loved it. The acting was above average though not fantastic but the play itself was absolutely amazing… pure poetry in action. It had me in tears at several points… the raw truth and emotions spilling out amidst the words…The flaws of humans and the way we destroy the people we love because we don’t dare to keep them for fear of losing them… We push what we want away because we are afraid of we want it too much… or we grip it too hard and shatter it anyway…

Remember that I didn't like Chay Yew's Porcelain which was the first part of he trilogy... really interested in Half Lives, the last of his Whitelands trilogy, waiting for it to show in singapore...

Next was A Beautiful Companion… watched this with some of my colleagues. We went for the pay-as-you-wish show. It was ok… the plot and acting was good, but the play itself was draggy.

And watched West Side Story on the 7th. (Bought the tickets last Nov on the day ticket sale opened and we still couldn’t get seats anywhere near the front! But still got center orch tickets). Enjoyed the show, as I was telling Shuhui… Some shows you go in expecting it to be good already because of the reputation (and the darn ticket price), so even when it does turn out above average, you aren’t blown away. (but there are exceptions like Wicked, that was out of my expectations!) West Side was good, yes, but it wasn’t mind-blowing fantastic. The vocals and set are of excellent caliber but it isn’t any less or more than my expectations. The only gripe I had was why didn’t Maria die in the end?!?! It isn’t loyal to R&J as I expected it to be.

Watching 2 or 3 plays towards the end of the month… will update when I get around to it…

Am not watching enough films though. Only caught Three Times with Xuan at the Picturehouse opening. It was good, typical Hou Hsiao Hsien style. The first part of the tripartite was so sweet. Almost couldn’t stand the silently shot second part despite the exquisite cinematography though. I just can’t stand silent films. Want to watch The Producers if for nothing that I love the actors and want to see the difference between the film and musical… now to find a time to see it before it closes… already hate that I missed Ingmar Bergman’s Saraband…

Also caught the finals of Campus Superstar and although I didn’t watch any of the preludes, I enjoyed the show. I think I fell in love with the winner from my alma-matar. He’s so cute and huggable! Plus I really liked the songs he sang. I’m quite impressed with the standard of these kids and the camaraderie they showed… reminded me of my JC days as Xinping said in her blog.

P booked his tix back for June… Can’t wait to see him and the days we get to spend together… Plan to take at least two trips together… Miss the way his presence calms me…. Miss the trips we take together and the experiences we share…

And that’s the end of this overdue and overlong update…

平凡的歌

最近在教《母亲》这个课题。学校的一个实习老师找来了一首阿牛的歌曲，《妈妈的爱有多少斤》。歌词很浅白，旋律柔和。很久没听这么单纯的一首歌了，没修 饰，没技巧，就是简简单单地将一个母亲和孩子之间自然流露的情感唱出来。好久没听阿牛的歌了，都忘了以前多么喜欢他的歌中的那份通俗的真。

炒一碟菜油要放几滴 煮一顿饭要用多少心
你煮过的饭有多少斤 谁能数得清 答案悄悄地藏在米缸里
妈妈的爱有多少斤 谁能数得清 答案写在她脸上的皱纹里

播这首歌时，班上出奇地安静。平时爱闹爱吵的学生听这首歌时好安静，有些眼眶微红。有些歌，还是通俗些，才能动人。

最近意外地都在听一些较平凡的歌曲。那天学生在做歌词演绎时，呈献了《有用的人》，尽管歌曲难找，他们还是坚持一定要这首歌。看到班上好多人都对 这首歌十分熟悉，在播歌曲时，他们都能跟着唱。当我说这是我第一次听这首歌，同时也没看过《小孩不笨》，他们讶然得有些好笑。但感觉到他们对这部电影的共 鸣。许多人都认为这间学校的学生都是顶尖的，但其实失败与挫折，人人都有。他们也都曾被人骂过：“你真的好笨”。三个月了，最大的收获，应该就是和这一班 多了一些默契，和对他们多了一份了解吧。从开始对他们那份沉默的气和无奈，到现在班上的些微气氛。尽管道路还很久，但我期待。

有些游戏结果不一定要获胜
有些收获不在终点而在过程

Holidays -- Come and Gone

Now Playing: 流水年华 - 庾澄庆

Second last day of the holidays and I have almost the same multitude of work that I had when the holidays started – papers unmarked, comprehensions unset, files unchecked… how did this happen?!?!

Stayed at home the whole day today in an effort to finish the comprehensions at least… but the results are dismal (only finished one with 3 left to go). Ugh, am missing the salsa fiesta for the darn comprehensions, I’ll finish them tonight if it’s the last thing I have to do to make it worthwhile.

Other things that made the holidays worthwhile (noted in point form to save time):
-- got a haircut and my very first pedicure that I’m pleased with *admires pretty toes*,
-- did a day out with mom (spa, shopping, food, movie)
-- ate two filling meals (a delicious salmon steak done rare and chili crabs), courtesy of dad in celebration of birthdays
-- spent a day at Borders, simply relaxing with a book

Not bad for a week of holidays, considering that 3 days were spent in school for trainings and seminars… still longing for June thou…

On another note, many thanks to all for the well-wishes on the day I turned quarter of a century old (^_^) Its happy to know that one is in so many people’s thoughts…

Crash

Just watched “Crash” , bought the second last two tickets that sat us right at the front row and now I have a permanent crick in my neck. But its’ worth it. It may not be better than Brokeback, but it had a message that speaks of truth.

Is it sad that I recognize parts of myself up there on the screen? The ignorance and the indifference to the ignorance I have towards those not of my race simply because I have no interaction with them and they play no part in my life. Self-centered but that’s me.

There is no black and white and somehow knowing that there are no heroes to worship and model after and no villains to slay makes us even more vulnerable and insecure.

The school’s been focusing on racial harmony recently and talks about closing the gap between the races. I would suggest playing the film to the students and teachers but I don’t think it will help, and not just because I doubt the students’ ability to understand the film.

Everyone is a bigot in some way or other and it isn’t anything that will be likely to solve itself with force-feeding lectures and speeches and attempted brainwashing.

It’s not just stereotyping. It’s the inability to understand each other. It’s the isolation of oneself and the slow subconscious thoughts that seeps into you. It’s knowing that we are all different and fear of that difference.

There’s hope in the film. Although there are parts of us that are too ugly to be seen, there’s also goodness that we don’t see. We are capable of vicious acts but also capable of heroic acts beyond belief.

And perhaps, the truth of that is good enough.

Second MC of the year

Second MC of the year and its still due to sore throat… the doctor was asking me what the hell did I do to my throat again when he saw me…haiz. Like I want to have sore throat like that…

Can’t wait for this week to be over… I think I’m more like a student than a teacher when it comes to anticipating holidays! Even holidays that are filled with work like the upcoming March holidays with translation and wushu training sessions and staff seminars and comprehension exercises and papers to mark. But I scheduled two spa days for me and Mom in celebrations of our birthdays. Also going to get a hair-cut and there’s a Salsa Fiesta on Saturday. Even more looking forward to the June Hols when P is going to come back so that we can go somewhere together. Debating between Thailand or Taiwan now with a extra short trip to KL?

Still, I really enjoy these MC days, all by myself in the house and the peace and quiet makes it easy to mark my papers… the papers and hours seem to fly by. Soreness of throat is pain but since I don’t talk to myself anyway it’s almost ignorable.

1st term is almost over, and I’m starting to get the part where I know all my students by name which makes it a lot easier…. The kids make everything worth it even when they are little devils out to get your last shred of sanity, so getting to know them is so important…

At the end of the term, one is supposed to take stock of one’s work life… but my thoughts seem to be running everywhere…

Making a Difference...

Now Playing: Bless the Broken Road - Rascal Flatts

Mom forwarded me a mail today that I want to share with all my teaching friends out there (of which there are many!)

I would like to share the following excerpt from New York Times columnist Thomas Friedman's speech at the commencement of Williams College on June 5 last year.

It goes like this: 'The dinner guests were sitting around the table discussing life. One man, a CEO, decided to explain the problem with education. He argued this way: 'What's a kid going to learn from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher? You know, it's true what they say about teachers: Those who can do, do, and those who can't do, teach.''

To corroborate his statement he said to another guest, 'Hey, Susan, you're a teacher. Be honest, what do you make?''

Susan, who had a reputation for honesty and frankness, replied, 'You want to know what I make? I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could and I can make kids sit through 40 minutes of study hall in absolute silence.

'I can make a C-plus feel like the Congressional Medal of Honor and an A feel like a slap in the face if the student didn't do his or her very best.' Susan continued, 'I can make parents tremble when I call home or feel almost like they won the lottery when I tell them how well their child is progressing.'

'Gaining speed, she went on: 'You want to know what I make? I make kids wonder, I make them question, I make them criticize, I make them apologize and mean it, I make them write and I make them read, read, read. I make them show all their work in maths and hide it all on their final drafts in English.'

'Susan then stopped and cleared her throat. 'I make them understand that if you have the brains, then follow your heart. And if someone ever tries to judge you by what you make in money, you pay them no attention.''Susan then paused. 'You want to know what I make?' she said. 'I make a difference. What about you?'

Yesterday was the release of the ‘O’ level results… my first batch… the overall results weren’t good and I was kinda disappointed by a couple of my kids that I spent a lot of time on when they didn’t score distinctions (actually I should be glad that they managed to pass at all!). But in the afternoon amidst walking around the school attending to various CCA matters, I was stopped by several of my ex-students… saying simply, “Thanks, we scored A1”. One kid that was very worried about his results last year called out to me from the 3rd floor when he saw me walking back to the staff room, “Laoshi thanks! I got my A1!”

In actuality… I don’t think I did a lot for these kids... they worked hard on their own for their own results. I simply answered questions and talked to them when they lost confidence. But perhaps in my own little way of giving them that extra bit of time… I did make a little difference… and that makes all the difference in the world to me when I see them….

Reading the above passage, I don’t know if I make all that much difference in my kids’ world. But I know I do make them read, read read. *grins* For many of us who are in the teaching line… its often tiring and tedious and never-ending….but one thing it is not… it’s not thankless. Especially when you see that little bit of difference you make… Here’s hoping all of us remember that in the daily grind of our life…

Draining week...

Now Playing: Dancing Through Life - Wicked Soundtrack

Had an extremely busy and tiring week…. The bones are now aching in a show of defiance against the torture I subjected them to…

Monday’s Jazz and Merengue got me home at an hour of 11 meaning I only managed to fall into bed after midnight, muscles burning from the two hour exercise…

Tuesday was dinner and play Long House with XP. We stayed for the post show talk with the director and playwright… thus I again got home at 11…

Wednesday, my Lion Dance had a outside performance at MICA in which we completed the seemingly impossible feat of carrying the drum and drum cart up the lorry by again roping in my poor ex-students… and after which was a swimming and sauna session with Mom which was satisfyingly hot and strenuous... the good thing was I got home early and was in bed by 10.

Thursday, an unusually stretched out pilates session and an extremely fulfilling dinner with JX after…

Friday is the first 2nd level U&I class… and Vincent was out to prove the difference between 1st and 2nd level by teaching 5 complicated sequences in which I’m starting to realize that my shoulders are in actuality not mine at all….

Saturday is my ambitious day to watch 2 plays in a day, Mahjong Eclipse and the Last Night of Jin Taipan, the latter ending at the hour of 11… with much delayed shopping done in between, exercising both the body and mind with the bonus of the wallet........

And now we are at Sunday… with my essays yet unmarked and the common tests papers coming in tmr….

华裔 06

今晚看了《金大班的最后一夜》，也不知是否因为之前的期望过高，使我三个小时后有点失望。尤其是对刘晓庆的演绎，整场戏看了下来，没有丝毫的感动，只觉做戏的味道过重。

从开场时，金大班首次现身，在夜巴黎舞厅的门口一站，应该是惊艳，却只见一个徐娘半老却非风韵犹存的女子做作的摆pose。接下来和童得怀的骂戏，原是我 很期待的一场戏，刘晓庆演来泼辣有余，却少了金兆丽的那一股锐气，十足象个泼妇骂街。最后那三声“哼”更是可笑，这就是金大班的狠辣气势？

台北夜巴黎的戏还看得下去，至少刘晓庆把金大班的苍凉与看尽风月的冷眼演了出来。但上海百乐门的那几场戏却真是让人失望。十里洋场的头牌舞女打扮 得那么媚俗已让人无法忍受，再加上女主角夸张的演绎，我真的看不到一个聪明伶俐，风姿绰约的金兆丽。更加看不出这女子凭什么成为上海的当红舞小姐。金兆丽 虽性格爽朗善良，但也八面玲珑，手段厉害。否则如何能在歌舞场中打滚二十年？听到台上的金兆丽的嚎哭时，实在忍不住皱眉，因为真的与我在小说中读的金兆丽 相差太远，再年轻的玉观音，也不该那样嚎哭，骨子里的坚韧要强不容许她下这个面子。

也许是小说让我感觉太过完美了，使我对歌舞剧百般挑剔。尤其玉观音金兆丽的形象在我心中太过鲜明，使我无法接受刘晓庆的版本。听说原来制作人想找巩俐或梅艳芳来演，真想看看她们的金大班会是如何。

不过下午的《非常麻将》却真的很精彩。三个演员与饰演的角色已成一体，丝毫没有演戏痕迹。剧本也让人回味无穷。这部戏有《等待果陀》的味道却没有《等》剧 的沉闷与乏味，可以说是这次的华裔我看的三部戏中最好的一部。《长屋》剧本可还算扣人心弦，但演员的功力毕竟还是差一截，演员始终无法融入角色。尤其竟然 还出现忘词的情况，实在很难原谅。不知何时，新加坡的戏会有人艺的水准？

Pre-CNY days

Typing this in school now in between marking journals that I have to finish in order to return my class tomorrow so that I can set homework for the weekend to give me more marking to do next week…. Ha…it’s a vicious cycle. (also in between of being called out by students for various misc. items including arrangement of tables and chairs...)

The week before CNY celebrations was not a good week… Besides been in charge of wushu which has two, TWO performances on the day of the celebrations itself meaning the entire week is taken up by rehearsals both dry and wet, I'm also unhappily in charge of the decorations meaning the week was spent running around the school monitoring students hanging up the various lanterns and red cloths, not to mention looking for poor students to hang the stuff up itself. Therefore, for the duration of the week, I was running around in between both rehearsals as well as wherever my students are hanging up decorations!

As if this is not enough, one of my wushu kids twisted his knee on Tuesday and I had to send him to the hospital…(I had to attend a meeting on Tuesday too so it ended up I was supposed to be at 4 places at the same time?!) And all kinds of misc. stuff was stirred up too because of this incident (accident reports, talking to coach, talking to parents etc etc etc), all adding to the whole cauldron of stuff on my already too full plate…esp since my poor kid is rendered immobile… thank goodness he is still in good spirits. He's really a good kid.

Seeing the week as thus, I'm proud of the fact that I still managed to exercise nearly everyday. Jazz on Monday, swimming on Wednesday, pilates on Thursday and U&I plus salsa on Friday. I managed to complete the full schedule! On such a week too!

In the end, Friday's celebrations turned out well. Both the lion dance and wushu performances were well received and I got a lot of compliments from other teachers despite the hiccups beforehand. Thursday's rehearsals sucked so much, the kids were all tired out from training non-stop since nov and horribly dispirited by Tuesday's incident. I was all ready for an awful performance, but they bucked up on the day itself… They are such a good bunch… the decorations were all up and ready… thanks to some of my ex-students who happened to be hanging around when I was desperate for help… and they did so without complain. Rewarded them all with goodies which are really not enough..

But I was all ragged by this time… after the celebrations and visiting my student in the hospital… so needed a break. Discovered that I forgot to bring suitable exercise clothes for U&I, so decided to go shopping at Seiyu. Wanted to buy suitable slacks and exercise tee anyway (being substituting shorts and t-shirts). So it ended up my new year clothes are exercise slacks and tees… haha..,

Met Sher for lunch and we had waffles. And she gave me such a sweet pressie! Its one of a kind and has a very special meaning for the both of us. We talked about how we don't meet up as often anymore… leaving us all nostalgic for our uni days..

Watched Memoirs of the Geisha… it really followed the book… know that some of my friends don't like it.. but I found that all that I didn't like about it are points that I didn't like about the book too… the abruptness of the ending twist being one. It kept all the parts that I liked about the book and the scenes are pretty, so it was okay. The three actresses lived up to the hype too so I'm not disappointed. Looking forward to Pirates and Casanova though. Also contemplating watching Brokeback again especially since its not going to be cut at all.

And that's the Pre-CNY days….

高行健

昨天和家人去了高行健的水墨画展，看了他跟《焦点》的访问和香港为他做的一个节目。也看了他的戏《八月雪》的几个片断，读了几页《灵山》。

不喜欢高行健。不喜欢他那自负又故作超然的态度。弟弟说艺术家都必须够骄够傲才能成功。妈妈说他有傲的本事。是吗？可我看过许多和高一样有本事的大家，一站在讲台上或与人交谈时，谦谦君子的风度自然流露，让人打从心底佩服。已达巅峰却仍保持谦逊之心，这才是所谓的成功。高行健自言艺术家是世界公民，一切只以人性为重。认为自己已脱离世俗眼光，作品被称超凡脱俗，戏剧禅意深远。是吗？

也许是我眼光庸俗，仍旧无法看得明白。傲不是不好，自负也非坏事，但太过骄纵的人，却又如何能够真正理解生命？ 一个故作清高的艺术家，又如何放低身段去了解何谓人性？一个超然脱俗的人，自认在乎的东西不多了，却在言语中流露对中国的埋怨。总觉得在听一个被赶出家门的孩子说不需要家的气话。虽然自称不在乎，语气的酸意却欲盖弥彰。无法放下，如何无我？明镜亦非台，何处染尘埃。若非无物，尘埃拭后仍来，徒留指纹在在。

哎，说了这么多，也不是说这个全球华人的首个诺贝尔奖得主不好。虽然他似乎挺埋怨得了这个奖。喜欢他说的一句话：“人的终极目标是在此刻当下，生命本身。” 能说出这样的话的人，总有值得人佩服之处。也许，只是我自己不懂而已。

无论如何，好久没一家人一起出门了。也真的挺开心的。

At the End of the Day

Now Playing: At the End of the Day - Emi Fujita

Misc. items for the past two weeks include a cousin outing which shows that I do follow up to what I say! Haha.. it wasn’t a very successful one though coz another cousin couldn’t make it becoz of work and my own brother was off filming the rain of all things.. We’ll try to get another more complete one in when cny rolls by…

Had my first vocal lesson with the second one due today. Also have a few lesson due to start next week… jazz, body movement and merengue if it isn’t cancelled… pilates was supposed to start last week but Helen couldn’t make it. But I managed to pull Lirong down for dinner and we had quite a chat so it wasn’t all a wasted trip...

Gab came over last Sat for a rest in between his many dates and we went down to Orchard together where we had respective dates for the night… caught a glimpse of his latest girl before I met Fen for dinner.

Also met JL and Shufen on the 2nd for lunch at My Humble Home. Always wanted to try the fusion food there… and it was really yummy. I had duck cigar roll which is juz a glam name for spring roll but it was very crispy and the sauce was just right.

Also got my gift from P from JL… Wicked soundtrack! And he really wrapped it up and added a surprise which turned out to show how sweet but silly he is…it brings back memories of that perfect night….

All in all, the first two weeks of 2006 have been quite fruitful… work-filled yes, but with little nuggets of fun in between… and I do enjoy the work despite all my whining and grumbling… It’s fun dealing with my kids and I had a few successful classes with my sec 1 kids that show great promise. My Sec 3s is another story but I’ll just try harder… Miss my Sec 4s, but I do see them now and again, the cheeky terrors… However, friends have been saying I look tired and colleagues comment that I look less “fresh” compared to last year…

Looking back the past two weeks of running to and fro…somehow the days seem to mesh altogether… I always seem to tell myself the same thing and yet forget it the very next minute, to take things slower… to take each day as it comes… to count my blessings at the end of each day...

Tomorrow's just a dream away
Close the curtain on today