Lost and Found

Been losing things and finding that at most inopportune places recently… and the sheer joy at the discovery is unbelievable…

Spent 15 minutes searching for my black top on Friday morning as I had my heart set on wearing it that day. 15 minutes might not sound like much but its A LOT on a school morning and it meant that I missed breakfast *and* the 640 bus and was almost late for school. As it was, I reached at the nick of time of 730am, 5 minutes before assembly and all for nothing as I didn’t manage to find the top in the end.

Spent the entire Sat morning searching for it again and questioned my parents to no avail. Gave up on it and was consoling myself by planning when I’ll go back to the shop to buy it again (I really liked that top!) when I suddenly had the inspiration to search the pile of clothes-which-I-try-and-discard-on-the-mornings again and miraculously found it! I swear I searched through that pile at least twice beforehand. But I was so happy.

Woke up this morning and had to go for a somewhat-formal lunch with my Mom. Was lazy to dress up and decided to put on my staple pair of earrings and dug through my gym bag for my white jewelry pouch — once, twice and three times. Took the bag over to my mom’s room to search more thoroughly and still nope. Felt the rising panic but was too tired to panic (suffering from the effects of sleeping at 3am)… Called my gym as that was the last time I saw the pouch. Gym promised to search and call so I went off for lunch. Gym didn’t call back by the time I got home so called again… and called again at 630pm only to discovered from the ringing tone that they closed for the day. Ok… undercurrents of panic (still too lethargic for a full- blown attack)…the pouch contains the jewelry my kids gave me for teachers’ day and my two staple sets of earrings and a misc. array of jewelry. If nothing else, the ring P gave me is in that pouch and I will kill myself if I lost it. Ironically, I was debating if I should wear the ring when I was in the gym but decided against it as I was afraid I’ll lose it while dancing…. Called Xuan… the person I always call when I’m feeling low…

Seriously thinking of what to do if I really never recover my pouch (and the ring!) when I decided to re-search my gym bag again…. And miraculously…I actually found it in a side pocket! Although why the hell did I put it in the side pocket where it could easily fall out is something I’ll never be able to fathom.

I can’t describe the incredible feeling I got when I found these stuff I “lost” through plain stupidity …. The feeling of being blessed and incredibly lucky… it’s almost worth the torture I went through thinking I’ll never see my stuff again… almost.

Now… if only I’ll find the wallet I lost last Dec… that contains my non-replaceable photos and matric cards from two unis…

Friends we don't see enough...

Now Playing: For Good - Wicked Soundtrack

Days been pretty jammed recently… sometimes I wonder if I’m pushing myself too much… Dad commented that I’m out till late almost every night and he doesn’t know how I get the energy to get up every morning at six… (although I admit that the morning hour of 6am is the lowest point of my life every weekday).

Work is piling up, more often than not as my papers have come in and the annual holistic report is due… I’m really lucky in the sense that as I’m teaching translation, I only teach two hcl classes and therefore has a smaller marking load than other teachers. My co-form is a dear and takes half of the holistic report workload off me too…but the papers remain piled and don’t seem to lessen… Also been informed that I’m down for O level markings… which extends my marking season till end of Nov… already anticipating the brain-dead-ness…

Recently met an old friend by accident while going for my jazz class at Capital Towers… didn’t know that she actually works at Capital Towers and already has for two years… Managed to squeeze in an hour on Friday for a chat over coffee… Somehow this reminds me of how I’m not meeting up with my old friends… I do see Lin every now and then (more then than now) and I see Xuan for dance every week… but otherwise… all my dear friends, JX, Shimei, Zai, Jia and more… Friends that watched me grow and whom I grew up with… friends that have seen me at my best and my worst and know me inside out… I haven’t seen them for ages and when I do it’s usually once a year. It used to be because they were overseas and I was overseas (or as in Zai’s case, she’s still overseas)… but now we are all on this small little island and we still see each other about once a year… even if Jia stays 10 minutes away!

What is it about human beings that we take such things for granted?

During the chat with Xiao Gua on Fri… I discovered that she’s actually leaving for China next year… and that made me resolve to see her more often. We met last year for her birthday and it’s been almost a year since. Somehow it made me question myself, does it have to take the fact that she’s leaving to wake me up? If she isn’t leaving, when will I take the initiative to meet her again?

I used to pride myself on keeping in touch with my friends. Somehow, the ability slipped away as I started work and various other commitments like salsa and gym. And because all of us is so busy and it takes ages to plan a meet (it took JX and me a month to find a time to meet up for a birthday), sometimes I don’t even bother to make calls when I want to watch plays… I usually just go with my mom or myself. Only to find out that my friends usually do want to watch too… (Yea, Gab, this means you. I’m confessing here).

Time… everything boils down to time… With dance lessons 4 nights a week and gym at least 3 times a week and usually a play or a seminar or some other commitment on the other night and catching up on my work on Sundays… I’m usually rushing here and there with barely enough time for a meal in between sometimes…

But is it worth it? I know I’m doing what I want to do…and I really do enjoy everything I’m doing… I’m making friends through salsa and dance… but is it really worth it?

Nothing will ever replace my friends… people that really know me and still accept me for who I am… and somehow that never changes… when I talked to xiao gua on Friday… it was like the year in between with no contact never happened… we knew what each other was talking about and we could talk about everything, from life plans and worries to yoga classes… we could pick up the unvoiced nuances in what each other said... that kind of comfort only comes from shared history and friendship… and I wouldn’t want to give that up for anything…

But I do fear that I take it for granted… I know my friends wouldn’t change… oh, we will grow and mature… but who we are inside, that wouldn’t change…and our friendship wouldn’t change… but circumstances do… and I’m just not seeing my friends enough…

And I don’t ever want my friends to think that I do not appreciate them because I do… we have shared so much together over the years and nothing would ever take it away and its priceless… and I want to see them more often… not just the once a year for birthdays and before either of us go overseas… but regularly as we used to back in uni and school… I want to be able to talk about our troubles and to share our happiness and to know what’s going on in their lives…I want that closeness that we used to share on a daily basis…these people are more than friends to me…

But will it happen? Will be meeting up with Jia for her birthday and Fen in October… been making plans to meet up with Gab for Happy (a date that has yet to materialize)…but its all not enough….somehow…

Aftermath... dancing....

Now Playing: Solo Por Un Beso - Aventura


Had the first late night in… months? Years? Haven’t stayed out so late for ages… I don’t know what made me stay in Union last night till 215am. My classmates were all surprised why “Cinderella” isn’t leaving at her 11pm curfew, and I actually stayed on after they left at 1am.

Just didn’t feel like going home.

Danced for six hours and did a lot of dances with guys that I always enjoy dancing with… really love the feeling of a good dance, dancing with a lead that doesn’t just have good technique but who actually feels the music and passion and dances with feeling…

Someone I don’t know and probably never danced with asked me by the dance floor last night if I was a good salsa dancer. It was a really weird question not to mention quite rude and out of the blue… but it set me thinking. Not about whether I’m a good salsa dancer or not… I suppose I’m adequate although I still can’t execute perfect double turns more often than not and my beat goes off at times as some of the dance partners that I dance with quite often say… but I do get compliments and enough dance requests to build my confidence on the dance floor :P (I’m really happy that I can go to union alone and still know enough people to keep me dancing as I did on Fri… it’s a long way from one year ago… )

Was talking with a guy friend yesterday by the dance floor and he asked me if I noticed how most of the guys at Union uses the same few moves and you never see a unique style…he seemed kinda demoralized (I can’t imagine why, he’s one of my favorite dance partners)…and he asked me why I enjoyed dancing with him because he thinks he’s the same… don’t remember my exact answer now but it was something like this. I do think that even if all the guys use the same technical moves, I get different feelings when I dance with different guys… the moves might be the same, but the passion is different. Some guys can execute perfect and complicated dance moves, but the dance can feel very cold. Some guys have very flashy styles, but you just can’t enjoy the dance.

Its not about the technique or looking good… its dancing with someone that makes you feel good, someone who makes the effort to protect you on the dance floor and immerses you into the music and the mood… even if its just doing basics and cross-body leads over and over again, it’ll still be fun and feel good… (and yes, I do dance with guys that do that).

I can’t explain exactly what it is about certain leads that really make me enjoy the dance… sometimes its just the feeling… like my last dance last night… it was a bachata dance and I still don’t really know the steps to bachata despite my 3 bachata workshops (yea, many apologies to the poor guys that danced bachata with me last night), but the dancer simply held me close and asked me to close my eyes and let him lead. So I did and I let the music overwhelm me… and it was one of the best dances of the night…

郁

最近不知为什么，感觉郁郁。其实生活很丰富的。周日工作量很多，而且都是看得到成果的。上了几个进修课，包括一连三日很精彩的孔庆东的讲座。自己负责安排 的讲座刚结束。卷子也改了大部分。晚上都有课，而且也蛮有满足感。周末都去跳舞，现在都很享受跳舞的时候，已不再如刚开始时的僵硬，认识的朋友也多。最近 刚刚考了英文考试，感觉离与期盼的未来近了些。十二月的假也安排了差不多。时不时与父母一起吃饭，看戏。上周和妈妈看了弟弟的表演，这周和妈妈看电影。周 三和林一起去了间酒吧听音乐。周日上了个蛮不错的舞蹈课。又开始上爵士课。下周将和妈妈看《雷雨》，周六考翻译课程的入学试。日子可以说是精彩。但不知为 何，就是郁郁。

总有些小小的不如意。总使人感觉不甘，因此而不开心。如此的放不下，放不开。无法释怀，也就郁郁。平最近总是忙碌。感觉自己被冷落。却不由得想起，自己刚开始工作时是否也如此。但却无法释怀。习惯被宠，习惯他的嘘寒问暖，习惯他每日的电邮，习惯他任我予取予求。

孔老师的金庸讲座，让我忆起了在大学时的日子，和上一个真正好老师的一堂精彩的课的满足感。怀念当学生的感觉，读自己有兴趣的东西，发掘新的体会与知识的那种满足与兴奋。生活的自由，精神的丰富。

学生最近是让我开心地泉源。他们的乖巧，逗趣，偶尔的贴心举止。但，考试将临，他们的不懂事也是让我烦恼的泉源。总觉得，自己实在帮不了他们什么。

也不知我还要什么。不知道自己还缺什么。生活按计划而走，却不懂得享受这个过程，只懂得怀念。这样的人呀。

生亦何欢，死亦何忧，悠悠世人，自扰实多。

What's in a bag?

Been lugging around a huge gym bag recently, and thus many friends’ greeting upon seeing me was not “hello” or “hey” but “what’s in the bag????” which prompted me to do this post which also helps me know exactly what am I lugging around???

Reminded somewhat of a local newspaper’s feature of detailing items in some celebrity's bag and decided to treat myself as a celebrity and do it that way with mini-explanations for each item, minus the cute celebrity photo :P


Shoes:
Ÿ white salsa character shoes, reason obvious
Ÿ black jazz shoes, for lyrical and ff’s groove & jazz and bodyjam classes
Ÿ blue track shoes/white dance sneakers in a black bbss shoebag, for step and combat classes
and yes, I do carry all three pairs of shoes around at days when I have all the classes!


Books:
Ÿ “Without You”, an autobiography I’m reading that P sent over from the states
Ÿ “Qingnian WenCai”, Chinese mag that the school ordered, great for short leisure reading and I’m using it to search for compre passages for the end-year paper I’m supposed to set
Ÿ Toefl guide book, borrowed from Eugene and my test is in two weeks!
Ÿ Blue Peking U jotter book, I have several such small notebooks, some pretty, some not. I use them to doodle and jot down notes… this one is already half filled with my Taiwan notes…

Utilities: since I joined the gym, I tend to shower before I go home… hence the many utilities pouches
Ÿ Shower pack, with my shampoo, facial cleanser etc in this waterproof black mesh bag that I keep in a plastic ziplock
Ÿ Moisturizer pack, a black kookai bag that holds a amazing array of moisturizers and toners etc for different times of the day and other extras like perfumes, combs etc
Ÿ Make up pouch, because I have some events recently like the RV dinner and JJ’s salsa party that requires make up…
Ÿ Jewelry pouch, to keep loose jewelry safe when I’m in the gym
Ÿ A change of clothes is usually in there too but it’s out the minute I get home…

Misc. Stuff:
Ÿ Ipod in a white drawstring pouch – for music
Ÿ iRiver mp3 player in a cute blue elephant pouch – I use this more as a usb drive and when my ipod batt dies on me
Ÿ my blue wallet (P has a matching grey one!) – holds my cards and cash
Ÿ 4 packets of tissue – I used to have none until I bought 4 for 1 dollar from a little boy at Maxwell last week
Ÿ Fitness First’s Sept/Oct schedule – I carry this all the time for easy reference
Ÿ Small packet of healthy snacks I bought from the Healthy Snack Day bazaar the school had last week… its quite yummy though I nickname it bird food
Ÿ And a piece of Dove Chocolate that my student gave me for teachers’ day
Ÿ Keys – on a green Chinese knot key chain my brother gave me back when I was fifteen
Ÿ My darling handphone in its amber handphone pouch – P bought this for me for our 5th Anniversary
Ÿ My Sec 3s’ formal letter papers – the current set of papers that I carry around all the time with the good intention of marking
Ÿ An array of red pens for marking and a single green pen for note-jotting
Ÿ A packet of red wet tissue I took from the ktv I went with my colleagues on teachers’ day – or to be more accurate, that Wanshi took and stuffed at me, saying that since we paid for it, might as well take it.
Ÿ A mismash of papers and bills lying right at the bottom of the bag that I do not dare to search through… it holds and is not restricted to my exams confirmation slips, information of various events I attended and have to attend like the Teacher Mass lecture and others I do not yet dare to think of…
Ÿ The Bag Itself! – a blue-grey Elle gym carry-all that I bought at Taiwan. I love it for carrying all my stuff without a complain :)

Tis' Life...

Had an extremely packed but fulfilling weekend…

My weekend started early on Friday night when I met up with Xuan for a quick dinner (p.s., there’s this mini bistro at Raffles Marketplace that sells quite yummy Saigon Baguette, refreshing filling and crispy bread, but must tell the girl to slice it else its very hard to eat) and the play, Salsa Salsa Salsa. I guess Homesick set quite a high bar… found Salsa x 3 slightly lacking with its choppy scenes and flubbed lines… still, for a first long play and the ability of the young playwright to get into the mind of 4 old ladies, its still a commendable effort.

Brought my students to Hwachong to attend a JC Seminar by NUS on Saturday morning, really enjoyed this outing. There was one lecture that was particularly interesting but that’s not the highlight. It was like a mass reunion, meeting up with my secondary school, jc and university teachers! I even met several ex-classmates-turned-teachers that were also bringing their students to attend. Caught up with kapoh who’s retiring end of this year… its sad… as he said, from next year onwards, when we step into the LEP room, there will be no familiar faces anymore… Also chatted with my uni prof who gave me several good suggestions on where to do my ma course. All the familiar faces made up for the slowly becoming unfamiliar campus… the two wings and canteen didn’t change, but the auditorium is one unfamiliar place… although one of my jc teachers commented that its actually deteriorating already…. Makes me feel old…

Rushed down afterwards for Belinda’s last jazz class… and probably also my last jazz class for awhile. She’s so sweet… and I’ll miss her so…

Went for a swim afterwards before salsa. Today is the complicated move that I remembered from Jan, didn’t help that I felt really tired…

Woke up at an unearthly hour on Sunday for the wushu competition… Reached school at 720am and the sports hall at 8am. Spent the whole day there as my kids’ last competition was at 4pm. Spent so much time and effort on this competition, both preparation and competing itself but it was all worth it, my kids did really well! We didn’t expect a single medal considering that we are so new and it’s an Open Championship. But we won 2 golds, 1 silver, 1 bronze and two placings of 4th and 5th. Really not bad at all for a first time try at the Open Championships! They are so moved that they actually cried on Saturday on winning our first gold. My sec 1s were in disbelief most of the time. Am really proud of them.

Went for dinner with my mom and dad after the competition at Sakae… I’m not spending enough time with them really… with my busy schedule… so was happy at the chance to spend some quality time with them.

Marked like mad for the weekend… have so many classes of essays, tests, letters and exercises that I’m slowly being flattened… Promised my Sec. 3s that they’ll be able to know their test results on Monday so was hiding in a corner at the sports hall on Sunday between my kids’ competition events to mark and stayed up last night to finish marking another class of essays. Will probably stay up tonight as well…. It’s the Annual Never-Ending Non-Stop August–October Marking Season again…. From CA to End-of-Year- to Mock Exams….

And so is life….

Another weekend's here...

Now Playing: Under the Weather - Kt Turnstall

It was a good week, partly due to the fact that there was only two days of school. Had quite a packed week though, but did mostly stuff that I liked doing and was doing for myself. Spoiled myself on Tuesday and Thursday and spent time with myself. Spent a lot of time with my family as well. Went to the gym with my mom on wed, and spent the day at home afterwards with my dad watching tv.

Met up with Lin on Thursday, with the both of us so busy, it was the first time we actually met up since the hols.

Watched Eleanor Wong’s Campaign on Friday after a extremely busy day at school. It wasn’t as good as Homesick, but it was still good. Guess it wasn’t personal enough for me. Watched it with Shuhui and Qinyu and we went for dinner/supper afterwards.

Took my kids down for translation competition on Sat morning to Changi. (got such a shock at the location when I first found out). I have really good kids for translation, it’s a competition that requires a lot of work and they are all so busy and piled up with work, yet they never fail to deliver. Even my backup who is even busier and won’t even really be taking part in the competition still did her work. I don’t know how we’ll do, but they have already done well for me and I'm so proud of them.

Went for Belinda’s jazz class afterwards and was so tired I lay down for a short nap since I was early. Went to the gym to swim after the class before going for salsa.

Yesterday night was a quiet night at union, but danced a lot; many friends turned up and had quite a good time.

Going to spend a quiet day today at home… woke up at 1pm! Finally going to get some marking done after the rude awakening that my class is due to write their 7th essay when I haven’t even marked the 5th and let them write their 6th…. I am so behind in my marking its slowly not being funny anymore…

Got two lovely presents this week…. A parcel from P which always brightens up my day with surprise postcards from DC where he stayed for a month and couldn’t find a single thing suitable for a memento and a sweet surprise from Lin of seaweed in the shape of animals she bought awhile back when I was feeling low. Feel so loved….









When I turn out the light, you're out of sight
Although I know that I'm not alone
Feels like home...

Weekend...

Had a full day of exercise on Saturday… counted when I met Eugene for dinner… it was about 7-8 hours! But somehow I’m not really aching anywhere today which is very good news. Muscles were screaming the whole of last week when I just started my exercise regime after joining my fitness centre. Hm… perhaps my body has adjusted to the change.

Yesterday was Vincent’s last class… quite sad… I’ll miss him so, he’s really the best instructor I’ve had… the one that can really motivate me to do the best I can. It doesn’t help that my other favorite jazz instructor is also leaving… Originally joined my fitness centre hoping that it can replace the jazz classes, but after taking one bodyjam class (supposedly the class that can replace my jazz classes), I’m starting to realize that its not quite the same thing… contemplating to try out O school… although how I’m going to be able to fit it in my current schedule is quite beyond my concept.

But I don’t regret joining my fitness centre despite the exorbitant fees…. The service is great and I still do like the classes, especially Body Balance. And for all that Body Jam lack in technique, it’s still a good workout. And so is Body Combat. And I love the saunas and steam rooms at all the clubs and the fact that I can shower and get my hair dry when I get home. Plus the view over the pool at One George St is absolutely gorgeous.…



All the exercise I’m doing is making me feel much better… somehow its clearing my head and I don’t feel so tired all the time so much… maybe because I don’t think so much when I’m doing the classes so my brain can finally take a break…

Woke up late today thou and decided to skip the morning body jam classes I was planning to take… after 6 days of exercise this week and the 7 hours yesterday, I guess I deserved it.

Watched Children’s Letters to God in the afternoon at the SRT. It was something different from Homesick on Friday… it had a certain innocent quality about it and yet something wise…the questions and the answers… I liked the songs and the actors are refreshing. Sometimes, perhaps we do need to see things from a different perspective… and a child always seems to see things clearer… with less distortions.

Met up with Dr. Lin for dinner at the Book Café and we had a wonderful chat… We always have so much to talk about and our conversations can range from academia gossip to thoughts of life…

All in all… it was a fulfilling weekend…

Homesick

Just watched Alfian’s Homesick today and I have to say, for the first play in the inaugural Singapore Theatre Festival, it really set a high standard. It started off on a quirky note and somehow managed to keep the light tone through out the two hour play that handled almost all the difficult and often controversial issues that barrages all S’poreans… from stayers and quitters to racial discrimination… making us see and reflect on all the issues in a different light…

When I said I was going to watch Alfian’s new play, a friend said something about watching another gay play… well… she was wrong… If anything, Homesick proved Alfian’s ability to write beyond gay issues. Homesick is the quintessential Singapore play… it is essentially Singapore condensed into two hours. And that is such a rare thing. For a quality Singaporean play about Singapore…

Homesick reminded me of why I go to theatre… not just for entertainment and relaxation from musicals like Cabaret (which was a really good broadway-quality show) or to be moved by touching storylines… but to feel. Homesick did that. It dug deep within and resonates… and I saw little bits of me and the people around me in all its characters… for a first time, I saw Singapore on a stage.

A story about a family of five children and the fact that all five are scattered all over the world…. And the way each of them love and hate their home and their nation...the bitterness they feel towards the country they grew up in… the issues they brought up striking a chord each time…the fact that we are living one man’s dreams… and in that case what happens to our own dreams? The way we are seeking our roots and where should those roots be? In China or in Singapore? Are we first Singaporeans or Chinese? And what do we call our culture? The way that we somehow can never face the fact that someone in our family married someone of another race… and the way no one wants to live in S’pore their whole lives…

Its no secret that I’m not planning on living in S’pore all my life… and the play actually invoked all the feelings I have for this nation… love, belonging, resentment, indifference… and the truth that nothing can change the fact that I grew up here and this is where all my childhood memories are… I was born here and grew up here… I studied and lived in Bukit Timah…I buy groceries from NTUC and used to spend hours in the bookshop at Beauty World… I spend my weekends in Orchard and City Hall and I go to Kwan Im Temple to pray for safety and good results… hope and nostalgia...

This is where my memories are… in this country with all its idiosyncrasies that I cannot stand and in two hours, Aflian somehow managed to sum up all my feelings and when it ended, I felt the pain behind my eyes from tears that won’t fall when something deep within really hurt…

For all the hype on the controversy of the play (esp. the L word that took a hold over the after show q&a) , I see Homesick as a play about a home. About people that after and under everything, is simply seeking a place within their family… a place where they are accepted and loved. Essentially and deep down, that’s what every character in the play wants…. And what we all want. In the Playwright’s Message, Alfian talked about the true meaning of “homesickness”… of how it is possible to feel homesick without leaving your home at all… and our dual feelings about Singapore…

For all that Singapore is… an accidental nation that sometimes cannot even decide how old she is… with its shifting identity and groundless roots… it is still the place we grew up in… the place we know better than any other in the world. And in that, it is irreplaceable.

No matter how we hate it often and love it rarely… and how we resent it like a child resenting its mother… we cannot deny the umbilical cord that connects us and how we can never really cut it.

This play doesn’t really change anything about how I feel… but it does make me think and reflect deeper… and most importantly, it touched something in me…

After all, what is home? It’s not just a nation. It’s not just a house. Yet, do we abandon the nation and the house? What are we really attached to? What are we homesick for?


I’ll really like to recommend this play to every Singaporean… its not a perfect play, there are still some kinks in it (Patrick’s about-turn decision was too abrupt and made the ending a little too pat, some characters are under-utilized and slightly cardboard ), but overall it’s an excellent play. Alfian’s words held a grace and sensitivity as always. For a rare play that is wholly centered on Singapore… it’s amazing. For an ending where almost everyone leaves in the end…it is actually unbelievable truthful… Its something we can be proud of.

Babel...

Darn, haven’t updated for like forever… (but I did update my other journal!)

It rained today… just after I was complaining that it haven’t rained for like forever yesterday when it was so darn hot. Was looking out of the bus window this morning and the skies were so black… not a spot of white and one would even think it’s still night… reminded me of the “end of the days” Hollywood movies… it was so going to rain.. .. ha. And when it did, its literally torrents. Actually quite enjoyed it as I was all safe and dry in school when it rained :p

Been out of school for the afternoons the past few days for oral (ha, it does sound kinda dirty when I say that as Nick pointed out the other day) Its kinda interesting and occasionally funny, been entertaining my mom and friends with oral anecdotes the past few days which masked the boring bits when I kept wanting the fall asleep while the kids droned on and on in front of me.

But it came at a really bad time (is there ever a good time?)… with the speech day coming up and wushu training mounting and the Beijing exchange school people coming this Saturday… I’m supposed to call all the sights we are to visit and arrange for the tours (feel like a tour agency) but I keep not been able to do that as when I get home from oral, the offices are already closed. And all that not including the actual teaching work and lesson preparations. Already am not been able to give my class homework this weekend coz I don’t have time to finish marking their books (can imagine them jumping for joy and praising oral to the heavens). Well, they had double last weekend anyway.

Am exceedingly tired also becoz I had a couple of late nights. Went for The Dresser on Tuesday. It was a pretty good play, there’s a lot of meat in it. Am starting to really like Adrian Pang… didn’t really take him seriously before with only seeing his comic roles on tv. But he’s a wonderful actor… his accent is amazing. And Wed was my second spins class. Am so going to miss Vince when he’s gone. And he’s going for two years! When he comes back, I’ll probably be juz weeks away from leaving for the states too. Darn Darn double darn. Thinking of trying a new jazz class somewhere… either the dance school opposite my place or this jazz school my brother is going to with a really funny name O.

Well, good news would be that I got a new cellphone. It’s a early anniversary pressie from P coz my old one’s keypad isn’t working. It was a horror to sms on and people probably found it weird (or as jx said, very character) to receive smses from me with zero spaces and only Caps to tell each word from each other. LikeThis. But I do miss my old phone… it was a 2nd anniversary pressie from P as well and I planned to use it forever and forever or at least until it broke apart… Still, I do like this new one. It comes with a camera (not a very good one but still usable) and I like being able to take shots whenever I see anything pretty… except I still can’t download the photos… apparently I need a CA-42 cable which somehow costs 88 bucks. Why does a cable cost 88 bucks when my cell only costs 168 bucks?!?! That’s like half the price of the phone. I so cannot understand.

Well.. tmr’s going to be somewhat of a treat with no oral, a short and hopefully interesting seminar and then will be going for my monthly pedicure. Will be trying a new pedicurist. And then its my weekly Friday dancing!

And that’s the end of this really boring babel…. (ha, from my translation class! I actually saw my favorite class from last year today for translation… am quite happy… but they feel different… not as sweet as last year… well… kids grow up….so sad….)

《天…使我爱你》

好久没看到这么一部让我流那么多泪水的戏了。《天…使我爱你》。

很喜欢开始的部分，信和小悦的爱情，那么的单纯，那么的甜蜜。信确实很呆，打扮也好土，一般女孩子，在看到自己被配到一个那么土气的男生照顾，一定很失望吧。但小悦却看到了那外表下的一颗真心。所以，她拥有了一个天使。

那么简单的恋情。雨天的伞，感冒时的感冒药。小女生的撒娇，小男生的呆气，面对女生的脾气时木讷得好好笑。那么让人会心，那么让人心疼。却是那么的梦幻，梦幻得让我们知道，是无法长久的。

真的不认同信的做法。无论带着多么深的祝福，亲手把自己的最爱推给别人，仍旧是残酷的。对自己残酷，对所爱的人残酷。

结局的多变是个败笔，大概连编剧也不知该如何结束，所以就什么都放进去了。但无论如何，仍是一部我喜欢的片子。

尤其喜欢编剧抄自《榭寄生》的那一句话，无论你在那里，我只离你一个转身的距离。

Guardian Angel，都是离我们这样远吧。只是一个转身的距离，但我们一转身，就看不到，因为，他已到我们身后守护我们了。

偷得浮生一日闲

在开学前的一天，偷得一个几近完美的一天，一个晶莹的时刻。

早上八点起来，父亲送我去看一部有趣的话剧。Play on Earth。是在三个国家同时上演的一个话剧，除了新加坡之外，还有英国和巴西的演员。一个跨越空间的演出，十分特别。我们还能看到其他国家的观众，还能相互招手。构思十分新颖，且演出也相当不错。

演出完毕时，才十点半。还很早，呼吸着早晨的空气，在一个酒吧街上，早晨是冷清的，但很新鲜。跑去一个朋友介绍的Book Café，那儿有舒服的沙发和许多书籍杂志，很适合烂上一整天，但因为距离远，所以只来过一次。现在正巧，从剧场走去不到五分钟就到了。找了个靠窗的沙发，赖在沙发上，点了一杯可可清啜，听着Café播的音乐，拿出一班作文卷子改，阳光明亮，不知不觉竟改了大半班。偶尔发闷时，捡起一本书随意翻阅，感觉有些糜烂。


一直呆到下午1点，才愿意伸直身子，收拾书包离开。散步到巴士站，搭巴士去乌节的图书馆和书店逛逛，再去KFC边吃炸鸡腿边读许佑生的小说。吃完后时间刚好看电影《王的男人》。电影拍得不错，戏子的戏很好笑，但就是悲了一点。

看完戏便搭巴士去滨海艺术中心。先去图书馆，找了个靠海的沙发，缩在沙发中，欣赏海景和对面的Fullerton的城市景象。看完了小说，再把这一班的作文卷子改完。

大约7点，起身到楼下的寿司店吃寿司刺身。点了一盘刺身配Baby Octopus，还有几碟寿司。吃得很满足。

晚上看澳洲剧团的Shorter and Sweeter。是一个由八个十分钟的短剧组成的话剧，每个短剧都很有意思，让人发笑，但也发人深省。其中一个《狗的心声》让我觉得很不舒服，另一个《城市一夜情》似乎给人希望。最后一个《极乐园》真的让人爆笑。是个让人很好玩的剧场。

好喜欢今天，并不是假日，人不太多，天气晴朗，感觉很舒服。
好喜欢今天，从早晨起床的那刻，时时刻刻都有所期待，感觉很清新。

戴了我喜欢的蝴蝶耳坠，移动时能感觉到蝴蝶轻盈地飞，仿佛如我的心情一般轻快。

好开心，偷得浮生一日闲。

Taiwan

Back from Taiwan…. Really enjoyed the week of backpacking with P…hostels and different itineraries every day… Missed these days of travel that we did in Europe which was 2 years ago already… P still remembered the strains of songs we created during the Europe days… traveling in the states just isn’t the same when we had permanent “homes”.

Spent 4 days in Tainan and 3 days in Taipei… Deliberately did this so that we’ll have more days in the country… Stayed in a Home-stay owned by a couple and it was like staying with their family. So very homey, complete with picking up their two kids everyday from school and playing with the kids at night. The couple was very warm and welcoming… The dad was also our personal guide and chauffer for the four days, bringing us to different sights everyday and ensuring that we get the full Tainan experience, from lotus blossom fields to the bamboo groves and tea fields mountains to the seaside coastal areas of oyster and salt fields… Different landscape every single day….It made our entire trip much easier and way more informative… and we had an experience of a kind of the lives of the people there…

First day was a rainy day… we went to GuanZi Ling… visited two ancient temples and had a free vegetarian lunch at one of the temples… it was a quiet day… the calming sense of old temples and the light drizzle…

We visited the lotus blossoms the second day… the reason we came to Tainan… because it’s the lotus and water lilies season… fields and fields of pink and white lotus in bloom and fragrant water lilies of every color with the backdrop of gold rice fields… Had a chance to pick the water lilies and drink the flower essence as well. Did the famous Guan Zi Ling mud hot springs and spa at night… so comfy…. Also went up to see the night lights after…

Went to Xi Tou Mountains the third day. It’s a mountain with tea fields at the top and covered in bamboo groves… We actually visited the tea fields owned by friends of our host family… so its not a tourist sight and we had the place all to ourselves… at the top of the mountains with a breathtaking view of tea fields and cloud-covered mountains…. With only the tea pickers in sight… it was ethereal…..

Last day was spent by the sea…. Took a ferry out to see how oysters are grown and harvested before barbequing fresh oysters… naturally salted by the salty sea water and so sweet by itself… attempted to climb a salt mountain afterwards which is much harder than we thought… the salt was loose and slippery and the also coarse and rough on the hands… wanted to give up halfway but two guys that already attempted the climb twice (they wanted to try to climb the mountain from different sides !?! ) told us to try and climbed up again behind us to support us. The view on top of the salt fields and fish ponds surrounded the area was worth it, but the sense of satisfaction is even better. We slid our way down, thankful that our jeans were thick enough : )

There are other little things as well… catching fireflies at night… visiting a cow farm and drinking milk freshly squeezed… a gorgeous sunset over a lake created by a dam… a Chatres-like hostel area of a local university… overall Tainan is a beautiful place…

The quiet and country pace of Tainan made us unused to the bustle and polluted air of Taipei… which is perhaps why we didn’t really like the city all that much… although we had happy memories of Shilin Night Market (where we spent out first night before taking the train to Tainan… loved the yummy foods and the relaxed atmosphere of the teahouse where we spent an hour sipping tea and listening to music). Spent our second night at Xi Meng Ting shopping… bought a sports bag that I have been looking for forever and clothes… Spent 3 hours in Eslite Bookstore (I love that bookstore!)… would have stayed longer if not for P complaining…

Escaped to Yang Ming Shan the next day…Trekked up to JuanSi waterfalls and Qing Tian Gang Grasslands…. It was a easy trek under the cooling green canopy and with a soundtrack of rushing spring waters… QingTian Gang is an amazingly rolling grasslands of several scenic tops with a cooling breeze… but the next trek up to Seven Stars Garden and Dream Lake wasn’t as easy… it was a killing trek up steep, crumbling steps under the hot noon sun… but the view is breathtaking… Trekked across the mountain to the other side of Yang Ming Shan before doing another hot spring and taking the bus down to the city… went to Sun Yat Sen Memorial Hall which is like one huge community centre… P couldn’t believe his eyes when a father and son holding badminton rackets walked in to the square and proceeded to play badminton right in front of us in on the road! Had dinner at Ding Tai Fung… the original store brimming with customers and a long queue.

Last day was spent at the Palace Museum and its amazing collection depicting the development of pottery glazing and various fine arts… went to Taipei Story House after that… a cute little house with a changing exhibition and this time it happened to be one on Wu Xia, my fave topic!

Overall, it was a wonderful week… tiring yes, but fulfilling too… and it made us feel like young students again…

I would do it again...

I would do it again. I would kill, destroy, maim – and I would love you anyway.

Don’t. Don’t say that. You can’t. You can’t have both.

Oh, but don’t you see. I already do.


These few lines…..they haunt me. They circle in my head again and again…

little memories of happiness

I’m a terribly unorganized and untidy person. Anyone who has seen my room or my office table can attest to that. I’m also the kind that refuses to throw anything away, thinking of them as mementoes that are keepers and proofs of memories in my life. It accounts for a lot of rubbish, but occasionally, every now and then, I find it so true and worth it… little moments in life that I will be madly searching through my bags for a misplaced ezy-link card and come across a mini-calendar-card-sized Manhattan subway map that I stuck in the hidden corner of a bag back in June when I was in New York….or picking up a bag that I haven’t used for ages and opening the front pocket to find ancient trans-island yellow bus tickets that reminded me of a time when P used to fold hearts out of these little bits of paper… combing through my wallet for cash only to come across faded cinema tickets that remind me of both the film and the friend I watched it with…sifting through my piles of paper to uncover a note written by a best friend that somehow got stuck there (probably when said friend helped my clean up my desk!)….digging into the pocket of a jacket to bring out a foreign coin I stuck there once when overseas… little memories of happiness and the little moment when I happen across these little bits of proofs allow me to relive the times…and I know its worth it… to live with all the clutter and the insanity of searching through everything madly to find whatever it is I need buried under everything and anything every single time… for these little moments of surprises and never knowing when I’m going to happen across a happy memory….

Bintan

Had three divine days in Bintan.... Beautiful beaches, clear waters and the softest white sands imaginable and the greenest tropical trees for a contrast… and a lovely horizon where the skies and seas dissolved into each other…

Idyllic days… a blissful three hour spa on the first day… such indulgence… loved the room with all the rustic touches and the heavenly scent and a view of the beach. I could sit there and sip sunflower tea all day…

Did water-skiing and jetski the second morning. Water-skiing was fun, the adrenaline rush and the feel of flying on water… but jet-skis beats it hands down with the pure speed and easy fun! It’s like motorcycle on water with the additional benefit of accelerating all the way.

Spent the day relaxing by the swimming pool with a book and ice-cream and dips in the pool when it got warm… and P buzzing around my ears all afternoon like a mosquito without a book to entertain him :p

Went for a walk along the beach… climbed the rocks for a view of breakers crashing against the rock… and walked from one point of the beach to the other.. the waves crashing around our bare feet… and sun glittering on the sea… picked up two pieces of coral with intricate designs… Went for a swim at sunset…swam towards the setting sun with the warmth of the sun rays on my back…

It was a wonderful three days and two nights of being pampered and looked after…felt like a princess…

Greece

Finally finished arranging my Greece Photos … brought me a trip down memory lane, seeing as it’s been five years since the trip (see how much I procrastinate!)

Greece will always have a special place in my heart… its one of the places I visit and actually want to return and stay forever (Switzerland and Boston are the only two other places). Love the isles and the Aegean, Mykonos with its gentle allure of blue and white calming spirit and Santorini with its irresistible fiery volcanic beauty… the windmills and clear waters and the glitter of the cities at the edge of the cliffs….Love wandering about Athens… never knowing if you are going to happen on one of the historical archeological sites buried under the city…living among the ancient civilization…with the Acropolis in view whenever you lift your head…

I just want to go back…

last day of school

Just finished packing… the staff room is a mad, mad place… open boxes and huge, black trash bags all over the place and blocking the already congested narrow passageways and towers piled precariously on top of each other. The high-pitch shriek of tearing tape can be heard the entire day together with laughter and moans as we perform acrobatic acts of hopping over the open boxes and avoid stepping into trash bags… of how we managed to accumulate so much trash and how we wish we can sweep everything one-handed into the trash bags… and how we again managed to pack something we need right now into a box already taped close… and naturally, we will not, even at the risk of gunpoint, open a box we have packed full and taped close which is naturally at the bottom of our tower of boxes anyway (Yes, I'm exaggerating)…

For a last day of term, chaos is perfectly normal as usual.

-----

My life has been full of newspapers recently. It included the trouble-strewn sec. 1 newspaper collections in which my kids brought newspapers on the wrong day and culminating to yesterday where they went all around the school in a one-day-garang guni attempt to collect at least 200 kg of newspaper and actually managing to collect more than 300 kg, earning the school 30 dollars…. The class was a mess of recycled paper the day before the newspaper collections… and my sec. 3 classes said they were missing newspapers due to the over-eager collectors. :p My kids can really do things when they put their heart to it… like the classroom cleaning… after a lot of nagging, the class was sparkling clean… floor mopped, tables wiped and all the corners wiped free of dust.. am so proud of them. Will be bringing P to the class barbeque on the 8^th, looking forward to their reaction :p

Also spent the past few days chasing after my Sec. 3 kids for way overdue newspaper cuttings… I actually really don't care but as the newspaper cuttings are compulsory to all, I have to do it. Spent the last day of school marking their newspaper comprehensions and ordering them to read newspapers at least once a week to build up their current affairs knowledge…

Actually feel quite hypocritical every time I tell my kids that they have to read newspapers… because I don't do it myself! For someone that gets her current affairs updates from reading Mr. Brown's blog every once in a blue moon (and marking my students' newspaper cuttings), I'm not a very good person for encouraging religious newspaper readings…

In fact, I remember back when I was a fresh 'A' level grad deciding which scholarship to pick up, upon hearing my decision to do the teaching scholarship, my ex-CL teacher said, "Are you sure? CL teachers have to read a lot of Chinese newspapers leh." Ha. She knows me best.

Despite her warnings, I still chose the teaching scholarship. And so here I am now. Force-feeding newspaper readings on students and not reading newspapers myself…but the newspapers reading are so necessary for the exams… without reading newspapers and going for exams is like going out shopping without money… but they so don't understand…

---------

Last day of school…. my desk is empty…. Going out dancing tonight….

first teaching anniversary

Today marks the first year anniversary of teaching… and I almost didn't remember. If not for the alarm I set a long time ago… it would have passed by without a ripple in my teaching life… Running up and down… scolding students for matters ranging from breaking the fluorescent tube by playing ball to not collecting enough newspapers… settling matters like their class outing and confiscating Da Vinci Code from students reading illegally in my class…It's a day just like another.

Still. It's been a year. Congratulations to myself.

-------------------------

Went for a course yesterday and skipped a day of school. Kept falling asleep though, am so tired. Only woke up for the discussions. The instructor played a movie at the end of the course and said it wasn't compulsory to stay behind… naturally, most people left. I was one of the three that stayed behind… partly because I felt bad, partly because the show left an impression. Remembering the Titans, it was a film more on the segregation between the whites and black than on team cohesion, still, it was no less inspirational. When Gerry met with the accident and Julius visited him, his answer to the nurse's statement of only kin is allowed is simply heartbreakingly true.

For a film that handles racial segregation and harmony issues, Remembering the Titans is definitely way more idealistic than Crash, despite being a true story. But sometimes, instead of handling the issues in a way that uses thought-provoking pain, films that give us hope might not leave a stronger impact, but it does give us a reason to try…

------------------

Term's ending… although it doesn't feel like it. I don't feel the sense of finality or relief. Not to say that I do at any end of term week. Work is still piled up and continues to pile as I type… Looking forward to the holidays though, especially for Bintan… three days of relaxing, with nothing more stressful than waking up late and lazing by the beach… swimming in the sea and ache-releasing spas…. Three days of not thinking of anything but what to eat for dinner…in fact, I'm not going to think about that either, P can decide. ….Three days of heaven…

---------------

Went for drinks with Lin last Sat as I was feeling moody…. I actually hate the taste of alcohol. But I just wanted to not think. Turned out it didn't really work. Went to two places, the lounge at Ritz recced by Gab, and Postbar at the Fullerton . Only had three drinks but I already felt dizzy and threw up. A bartender was so worried that she held my hand all the way to the toilet and pushed a mug of warm lime water to Lin to make me drink when I didn't return to the bar after. Lin was amazing… she took care of me all night, entertaining my whims and tantrums and took me home when it appeared that I shouldn't drink anymore… I don't remember all that I've said except that it was probably very embarrassing and nonsensical and she stayed with me all the way and through the night… She said she's never seen me so upset in all our years of friendship and I'm long overdue for a breakdown… I don't know, all I know is that I hope I can snap out of this mood soon…. And I'm incredibly lucky to have Lin….

Despondency

Haven't updated for what feels like forever but turns out to be only roughly one month. This is so not good… bad, bad behavior.

Let's see… news of the month… my wushu kids did really well, most got quite a good ranking and it's was a very good experience for them. One of them did miraculously well and won a gold medal! She beat 20 other pple that trained for years even though she only trained for 2 months. Quite proud of them, for a first time, its quite a achievement.

Marking season came and went together with its days and nights of hell-froze-over-nothing-is-more-important-than-non-stop-marking…

Watched a number of plays… but somehow all seems rather blurry in my mind now except for a very simple production of Dogs Barking at a obscure corner of this little island that I've never been before. The acting was okay and the set was good but the play itself was unexpectedly provoking… the ideas of how people and emotions change and yet essentially do not… unspeakable stuff that we are capable of doing to those we once loved and still do love… I especially liked the way it ended with a short look at the way it all once started… we forget sometimes… that we were the ones that hurt ourselves in the beginning… but who can blame us? Was crying at the bus stop after the play… somehow it touched a part of me that I didn't expect…

Other shows include Burn the Floor (quality dancing), A Very British Affair (a fun night out with lots of laugh although the singing really quite sucks compared to real Broadway) and others that blurs in my mind now…

A top news recently would be the scary dental operation I underwent… with needles and thread and scissors and drills waving all over my face and a half numb jaw plus five days of porridge in which I naturally crave my Ruffles chips… all in exchange for taking out two wisdom teeth. It all seems so not worthwhile… Teeth are still numb.

Been taking turns class recently…. And conclusion is that a lot more classes are needed before I can do my turns… Haven't danced for a long time due to the operation and won't be dancing again this week as I'm watching Man of Letters on Friday with Gabriel…

Haiz… been very moody recently… nothing seems to get my spirits up and nothing makes me happy… even the news barely have anything happy in it…

爱玫瑰

在听周华健的“爱玫瑰“。听到一句“爱在十七是完美，怎么都不会累，他吻了我的额头让我无法入睡 “。带回了许多回忆。与其说回忆，不如说感觉。十七岁时的爱情，什么都甜美。似乎没有什么比之更重要。每天都为之开心或伤心得无法入睡。只在乎感觉。那么 的天真，单纯。相比下，现在的爱情，成熟，疲惫。考虑的东西之多，已远远超过当时简单的感觉。

“爱在你眼中是谁？会不会有玫瑰？“
我的爱情没有玫瑰，有的是百合与薰衣草。还有一个北京夜晚，我漫步回宿舍时买的满天星。虽然不是他送的，但我记得，那时我一手抱着满天星，一手握着手机和他讲话，心中的喜悦有他陪我分享。

他很久没送我花了。因为慢慢发现，花儿凋谢时的伤感已渐渐胜过收到花儿的喜悦，因此告诉他别再送了。有心就好。（而且新加坡的花比北京的贵太多了）

不知为何，忽然间很想收到一束满天星。简单，单纯。

scrambled thoughts

April 9th. Today is a special day because of a promise made.

Suddenly, everything is seen through different light… nothing changes but everything changes… essentially…

Its funny how everything happens on the 9th for us… hopefully it really means something ...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On another note, yesterday was the translation competition. I’m so proud of my kids! They actually got into the finals ^_^ I really didn’t expect them to get in despite all my threats. I know, its only 4th, but 4 out of 79 teams means a great deal. And they really did very well and stood up under some very tough competition. I know that they are still upset with the results (they were so close!) but I’m really very proud of them already. All those training sessions were really worth it. They were quite disappointed when they knew that the trophy and prize money were all going straight to the school, so I treated them to lunch at Sakae after. I’ll miss them with the end of weekly training sessions… (and they were talking about celebrating their freedom!)

One down, five more competition days to go… hope my wushu kids do as well …

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Next two weeks will be hell with the afternoons all taken up and marking undone… Chinese orals for the first week and Wushu competitons the second. Still there’s Good Friday to look forward to. Treating Shimei for a pedicure and going for a play after on Sat. And may be meeting up with my favorite aunt for her birthday on Fri itself.

Also will be meeting JX. Both of us have been making plans to meet up since mid-March and the planned dinner never materialized… Its like “Why are you so busy???” and “Why are YOU so busy???” right back between the both of us... finally set a date on the 17th which both of us die die will make it for…

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

April is my theatre month (I seem to have theatre months every alternate months! Watched numerous plays in Feb and none in Jan and March. Watching numerous plays in April and none in May. Already bought 4 tickets for June coz it’s the Arts Fest and none as yet for July… hmm. Weird coincidence?)

Watched A Language of Their Own by checkpoint theatre and loved it. The acting was above average though not fantastic but the play itself was absolutely amazing… pure poetry in action. It had me in tears at several points… the raw truth and emotions spilling out amidst the words…The flaws of humans and the way we destroy the people we love because we don’t dare to keep them for fear of losing them… We push what we want away because we are afraid of we want it too much… or we grip it too hard and shatter it anyway…

Remember that I didn't like Chay Yew's Porcelain which was the first part of he trilogy... really interested in Half Lives, the last of his Whitelands trilogy, waiting for it to show in singapore...

Next was A Beautiful Companion… watched this with some of my colleagues. We went for the pay-as-you-wish show. It was ok… the plot and acting was good, but the play itself was draggy.

And watched West Side Story on the 7th. (Bought the tickets last Nov on the day ticket sale opened and we still couldn’t get seats anywhere near the front! But still got center orch tickets). Enjoyed the show, as I was telling Shuhui… Some shows you go in expecting it to be good already because of the reputation (and the darn ticket price), so even when it does turn out above average, you aren’t blown away. (but there are exceptions like Wicked, that was out of my expectations!) West Side was good, yes, but it wasn’t mind-blowing fantastic. The vocals and set are of excellent caliber but it isn’t any less or more than my expectations. The only gripe I had was why didn’t Maria die in the end?!?! It isn’t loyal to R&J as I expected it to be.

Watching 2 or 3 plays towards the end of the month… will update when I get around to it…

Am not watching enough films though. Only caught Three Times with Xuan at the Picturehouse opening. It was good, typical Hou Hsiao Hsien style. The first part of the tripartite was so sweet. Almost couldn’t stand the silently shot second part despite the exquisite cinematography though. I just can’t stand silent films. Want to watch The Producers if for nothing that I love the actors and want to see the difference between the film and musical… now to find a time to see it before it closes… already hate that I missed Ingmar Bergman’s Saraband…

Also caught the finals of Campus Superstar and although I didn’t watch any of the preludes, I enjoyed the show. I think I fell in love with the winner from my alma-matar. He’s so cute and huggable! Plus I really liked the songs he sang. I’m quite impressed with the standard of these kids and the camaraderie they showed… reminded me of my JC days as Xinping said in her blog.

P booked his tix back for June… Can’t wait to see him and the days we get to spend together… Plan to take at least two trips together… Miss the way his presence calms me…. Miss the trips we take together and the experiences we share…

And that’s the end of this overdue and overlong update…

平凡的歌

最近在教《母亲》这个课题。学校的一个实习老师找来了一首阿牛的歌曲，《妈妈的爱有多少斤》。歌词很浅白，旋律柔和。很久没听这么单纯的一首歌了，没修 饰，没技巧，就是简简单单地将一个母亲和孩子之间自然流露的情感唱出来。好久没听阿牛的歌了，都忘了以前多么喜欢他的歌中的那份通俗的真。

炒一碟菜油要放几滴 煮一顿饭要用多少心
你煮过的饭有多少斤 谁能数得清 答案悄悄地藏在米缸里
妈妈的爱有多少斤 谁能数得清 答案写在她脸上的皱纹里

播这首歌时，班上出奇地安静。平时爱闹爱吵的学生听这首歌时好安静，有些眼眶微红。有些歌，还是通俗些，才能动人。

最近意外地都在听一些较平凡的歌曲。那天学生在做歌词演绎时，呈献了《有用的人》，尽管歌曲难找，他们还是坚持一定要这首歌。看到班上好多人都对 这首歌十分熟悉，在播歌曲时，他们都能跟着唱。当我说这是我第一次听这首歌，同时也没看过《小孩不笨》，他们讶然得有些好笑。但感觉到他们对这部电影的共 鸣。许多人都认为这间学校的学生都是顶尖的，但其实失败与挫折，人人都有。他们也都曾被人骂过：“你真的好笨”。三个月了，最大的收获，应该就是和这一班 多了一些默契，和对他们多了一份了解吧。从开始对他们那份沉默的气和无奈，到现在班上的些微气氛。尽管道路还很久，但我期待。

有些游戏结果不一定要获胜
有些收获不在终点而在过程

Holidays -- Come and Gone

Now Playing: 流水年华 - 庾澄庆

Second last day of the holidays and I have almost the same multitude of work that I had when the holidays started – papers unmarked, comprehensions unset, files unchecked… how did this happen?!?!

Stayed at home the whole day today in an effort to finish the comprehensions at least… but the results are dismal (only finished one with 3 left to go). Ugh, am missing the salsa fiesta for the darn comprehensions, I’ll finish them tonight if it’s the last thing I have to do to make it worthwhile.

Other things that made the holidays worthwhile (noted in point form to save time):
-- got a haircut and my very first pedicure that I’m pleased with *admires pretty toes*,
-- did a day out with mom (spa, shopping, food, movie)
-- ate two filling meals (a delicious salmon steak done rare and chili crabs), courtesy of dad in celebration of birthdays
-- spent a day at Borders, simply relaxing with a book

Not bad for a week of holidays, considering that 3 days were spent in school for trainings and seminars… still longing for June thou…

On another note, many thanks to all for the well-wishes on the day I turned quarter of a century old (^_^) Its happy to know that one is in so many people’s thoughts…

Crash

Just watched “Crash” , bought the second last two tickets that sat us right at the front row and now I have a permanent crick in my neck. But its’ worth it. It may not be better than Brokeback, but it had a message that speaks of truth.

Is it sad that I recognize parts of myself up there on the screen? The ignorance and the indifference to the ignorance I have towards those not of my race simply because I have no interaction with them and they play no part in my life. Self-centered but that’s me.

There is no black and white and somehow knowing that there are no heroes to worship and model after and no villains to slay makes us even more vulnerable and insecure.

The school’s been focusing on racial harmony recently and talks about closing the gap between the races. I would suggest playing the film to the students and teachers but I don’t think it will help, and not just because I doubt the students’ ability to understand the film.

Everyone is a bigot in some way or other and it isn’t anything that will be likely to solve itself with force-feeding lectures and speeches and attempted brainwashing.

It’s not just stereotyping. It’s the inability to understand each other. It’s the isolation of oneself and the slow subconscious thoughts that seeps into you. It’s knowing that we are all different and fear of that difference.

There’s hope in the film. Although there are parts of us that are too ugly to be seen, there’s also goodness that we don’t see. We are capable of vicious acts but also capable of heroic acts beyond belief.

And perhaps, the truth of that is good enough.

Second MC of the year

Second MC of the year and its still due to sore throat… the doctor was asking me what the hell did I do to my throat again when he saw me…haiz. Like I want to have sore throat like that…

Can’t wait for this week to be over… I think I’m more like a student than a teacher when it comes to anticipating holidays! Even holidays that are filled with work like the upcoming March holidays with translation and wushu training sessions and staff seminars and comprehension exercises and papers to mark. But I scheduled two spa days for me and Mom in celebrations of our birthdays. Also going to get a hair-cut and there’s a Salsa Fiesta on Saturday. Even more looking forward to the June Hols when P is going to come back so that we can go somewhere together. Debating between Thailand or Taiwan now with a extra short trip to KL?

Still, I really enjoy these MC days, all by myself in the house and the peace and quiet makes it easy to mark my papers… the papers and hours seem to fly by. Soreness of throat is pain but since I don’t talk to myself anyway it’s almost ignorable.

1st term is almost over, and I’m starting to get the part where I know all my students by name which makes it a lot easier…. The kids make everything worth it even when they are little devils out to get your last shred of sanity, so getting to know them is so important…

At the end of the term, one is supposed to take stock of one’s work life… but my thoughts seem to be running everywhere…

Making a Difference...

Now Playing: Bless the Broken Road - Rascal Flatts

Mom forwarded me a mail today that I want to share with all my teaching friends out there (of which there are many!)

I would like to share the following excerpt from New York Times columnist Thomas Friedman's speech at the commencement of Williams College on June 5 last year.

It goes like this: 'The dinner guests were sitting around the table discussing life. One man, a CEO, decided to explain the problem with education. He argued this way: 'What's a kid going to learn from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher? You know, it's true what they say about teachers: Those who can do, do, and those who can't do, teach.''

To corroborate his statement he said to another guest, 'Hey, Susan, you're a teacher. Be honest, what do you make?''

Susan, who had a reputation for honesty and frankness, replied, 'You want to know what I make? I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could and I can make kids sit through 40 minutes of study hall in absolute silence.

'I can make a C-plus feel like the Congressional Medal of Honor and an A feel like a slap in the face if the student didn't do his or her very best.' Susan continued, 'I can make parents tremble when I call home or feel almost like they won the lottery when I tell them how well their child is progressing.'

'Gaining speed, she went on: 'You want to know what I make? I make kids wonder, I make them question, I make them criticize, I make them apologize and mean it, I make them write and I make them read, read, read. I make them show all their work in maths and hide it all on their final drafts in English.'

'Susan then stopped and cleared her throat. 'I make them understand that if you have the brains, then follow your heart. And if someone ever tries to judge you by what you make in money, you pay them no attention.''Susan then paused. 'You want to know what I make?' she said. 'I make a difference. What about you?'

Yesterday was the release of the ‘O’ level results… my first batch… the overall results weren’t good and I was kinda disappointed by a couple of my kids that I spent a lot of time on when they didn’t score distinctions (actually I should be glad that they managed to pass at all!). But in the afternoon amidst walking around the school attending to various CCA matters, I was stopped by several of my ex-students… saying simply, “Thanks, we scored A1”. One kid that was very worried about his results last year called out to me from the 3rd floor when he saw me walking back to the staff room, “Laoshi thanks! I got my A1!”

In actuality… I don’t think I did a lot for these kids... they worked hard on their own for their own results. I simply answered questions and talked to them when they lost confidence. But perhaps in my own little way of giving them that extra bit of time… I did make a little difference… and that makes all the difference in the world to me when I see them….

Reading the above passage, I don’t know if I make all that much difference in my kids’ world. But I know I do make them read, read read. *grins* For many of us who are in the teaching line… its often tiring and tedious and never-ending….but one thing it is not… it’s not thankless. Especially when you see that little bit of difference you make… Here’s hoping all of us remember that in the daily grind of our life…

Draining week...

Now Playing: Dancing Through Life - Wicked Soundtrack

Had an extremely busy and tiring week…. The bones are now aching in a show of defiance against the torture I subjected them to…

Monday’s Jazz and Merengue got me home at an hour of 11 meaning I only managed to fall into bed after midnight, muscles burning from the two hour exercise…

Tuesday was dinner and play Long House with XP. We stayed for the post show talk with the director and playwright… thus I again got home at 11…

Wednesday, my Lion Dance had a outside performance at MICA in which we completed the seemingly impossible feat of carrying the drum and drum cart up the lorry by again roping in my poor ex-students… and after which was a swimming and sauna session with Mom which was satisfyingly hot and strenuous... the good thing was I got home early and was in bed by 10.

Thursday, an unusually stretched out pilates session and an extremely fulfilling dinner with JX after…

Friday is the first 2nd level U&I class… and Vincent was out to prove the difference between 1st and 2nd level by teaching 5 complicated sequences in which I’m starting to realize that my shoulders are in actuality not mine at all….

Saturday is my ambitious day to watch 2 plays in a day, Mahjong Eclipse and the Last Night of Jin Taipan, the latter ending at the hour of 11… with much delayed shopping done in between, exercising both the body and mind with the bonus of the wallet........

And now we are at Sunday… with my essays yet unmarked and the common tests papers coming in tmr….

华裔 06

今晚看了《金大班的最后一夜》，也不知是否因为之前的期望过高，使我三个小时后有点失望。尤其是对刘晓庆的演绎，整场戏看了下来，没有丝毫的感动，只觉做戏的味道过重。

从开场时，金大班首次现身，在夜巴黎舞厅的门口一站，应该是惊艳，却只见一个徐娘半老却非风韵犹存的女子做作的摆pose。接下来和童得怀的骂戏，原是我 很期待的一场戏，刘晓庆演来泼辣有余，却少了金兆丽的那一股锐气，十足象个泼妇骂街。最后那三声“哼”更是可笑，这就是金大班的狠辣气势？

台北夜巴黎的戏还看得下去，至少刘晓庆把金大班的苍凉与看尽风月的冷眼演了出来。但上海百乐门的那几场戏却真是让人失望。十里洋场的头牌舞女打扮 得那么媚俗已让人无法忍受，再加上女主角夸张的演绎，我真的看不到一个聪明伶俐，风姿绰约的金兆丽。更加看不出这女子凭什么成为上海的当红舞小姐。金兆丽 虽性格爽朗善良，但也八面玲珑，手段厉害。否则如何能在歌舞场中打滚二十年？听到台上的金兆丽的嚎哭时，实在忍不住皱眉，因为真的与我在小说中读的金兆丽 相差太远，再年轻的玉观音，也不该那样嚎哭，骨子里的坚韧要强不容许她下这个面子。

也许是小说让我感觉太过完美了，使我对歌舞剧百般挑剔。尤其玉观音金兆丽的形象在我心中太过鲜明，使我无法接受刘晓庆的版本。听说原来制作人想找巩俐或梅艳芳来演，真想看看她们的金大班会是如何。

不过下午的《非常麻将》却真的很精彩。三个演员与饰演的角色已成一体，丝毫没有演戏痕迹。剧本也让人回味无穷。这部戏有《等待果陀》的味道却没有《等》剧 的沉闷与乏味，可以说是这次的华裔我看的三部戏中最好的一部。《长屋》剧本可还算扣人心弦，但演员的功力毕竟还是差一截，演员始终无法融入角色。尤其竟然 还出现忘词的情况，实在很难原谅。不知何时，新加坡的戏会有人艺的水准？

Pre-CNY days

Typing this in school now in between marking journals that I have to finish in order to return my class tomorrow so that I can set homework for the weekend to give me more marking to do next week…. Ha…it’s a vicious cycle. (also in between of being called out by students for various misc. items including arrangement of tables and chairs...)

The week before CNY celebrations was not a good week… Besides been in charge of wushu which has two, TWO performances on the day of the celebrations itself meaning the entire week is taken up by rehearsals both dry and wet, I'm also unhappily in charge of the decorations meaning the week was spent running around the school monitoring students hanging up the various lanterns and red cloths, not to mention looking for poor students to hang the stuff up itself. Therefore, for the duration of the week, I was running around in between both rehearsals as well as wherever my students are hanging up decorations!

As if this is not enough, one of my wushu kids twisted his knee on Tuesday and I had to send him to the hospital…(I had to attend a meeting on Tuesday too so it ended up I was supposed to be at 4 places at the same time?!) And all kinds of misc. stuff was stirred up too because of this incident (accident reports, talking to coach, talking to parents etc etc etc), all adding to the whole cauldron of stuff on my already too full plate…esp since my poor kid is rendered immobile… thank goodness he is still in good spirits. He's really a good kid.

Seeing the week as thus, I'm proud of the fact that I still managed to exercise nearly everyday. Jazz on Monday, swimming on Wednesday, pilates on Thursday and U&I plus salsa on Friday. I managed to complete the full schedule! On such a week too!

In the end, Friday's celebrations turned out well. Both the lion dance and wushu performances were well received and I got a lot of compliments from other teachers despite the hiccups beforehand. Thursday's rehearsals sucked so much, the kids were all tired out from training non-stop since nov and horribly dispirited by Tuesday's incident. I was all ready for an awful performance, but they bucked up on the day itself… They are such a good bunch… the decorations were all up and ready… thanks to some of my ex-students who happened to be hanging around when I was desperate for help… and they did so without complain. Rewarded them all with goodies which are really not enough..

But I was all ragged by this time… after the celebrations and visiting my student in the hospital… so needed a break. Discovered that I forgot to bring suitable exercise clothes for U&I, so decided to go shopping at Seiyu. Wanted to buy suitable slacks and exercise tee anyway (being substituting shorts and t-shirts). So it ended up my new year clothes are exercise slacks and tees… haha..,

Met Sher for lunch and we had waffles. And she gave me such a sweet pressie! Its one of a kind and has a very special meaning for the both of us. We talked about how we don't meet up as often anymore… leaving us all nostalgic for our uni days..

Watched Memoirs of the Geisha… it really followed the book… know that some of my friends don't like it.. but I found that all that I didn't like about it are points that I didn't like about the book too… the abruptness of the ending twist being one. It kept all the parts that I liked about the book and the scenes are pretty, so it was okay. The three actresses lived up to the hype too so I'm not disappointed. Looking forward to Pirates and Casanova though. Also contemplating watching Brokeback again especially since its not going to be cut at all.

And that's the Pre-CNY days….

高行健

昨天和家人去了高行健的水墨画展，看了他跟《焦点》的访问和香港为他做的一个节目。也看了他的戏《八月雪》的几个片断，读了几页《灵山》。

不喜欢高行健。不喜欢他那自负又故作超然的态度。弟弟说艺术家都必须够骄够傲才能成功。妈妈说他有傲的本事。是吗？可我看过许多和高一样有本事的大家，一站在讲台上或与人交谈时，谦谦君子的风度自然流露，让人打从心底佩服。已达巅峰却仍保持谦逊之心，这才是所谓的成功。高行健自言艺术家是世界公民，一切只以人性为重。认为自己已脱离世俗眼光，作品被称超凡脱俗，戏剧禅意深远。是吗？

也许是我眼光庸俗，仍旧无法看得明白。傲不是不好，自负也非坏事，但太过骄纵的人，却又如何能够真正理解生命？ 一个故作清高的艺术家，又如何放低身段去了解何谓人性？一个超然脱俗的人，自认在乎的东西不多了，却在言语中流露对中国的埋怨。总觉得在听一个被赶出家门的孩子说不需要家的气话。虽然自称不在乎，语气的酸意却欲盖弥彰。无法放下，如何无我？明镜亦非台，何处染尘埃。若非无物，尘埃拭后仍来，徒留指纹在在。

哎，说了这么多，也不是说这个全球华人的首个诺贝尔奖得主不好。虽然他似乎挺埋怨得了这个奖。喜欢他说的一句话：“人的终极目标是在此刻当下，生命本身。” 能说出这样的话的人，总有值得人佩服之处。也许，只是我自己不懂而已。

无论如何，好久没一家人一起出门了。也真的挺开心的。

At the End of the Day

Now Playing: At the End of the Day - Emi Fujita

Misc. items for the past two weeks include a cousin outing which shows that I do follow up to what I say! Haha.. it wasn’t a very successful one though coz another cousin couldn’t make it becoz of work and my own brother was off filming the rain of all things.. We’ll try to get another more complete one in when cny rolls by…

Had my first vocal lesson with the second one due today. Also have a few lesson due to start next week… jazz, body movement and merengue if it isn’t cancelled… pilates was supposed to start last week but Helen couldn’t make it. But I managed to pull Lirong down for dinner and we had quite a chat so it wasn’t all a wasted trip...

Gab came over last Sat for a rest in between his many dates and we went down to Orchard together where we had respective dates for the night… caught a glimpse of his latest girl before I met Fen for dinner.

Also met JL and Shufen on the 2nd for lunch at My Humble Home. Always wanted to try the fusion food there… and it was really yummy. I had duck cigar roll which is juz a glam name for spring roll but it was very crispy and the sauce was just right.

Also got my gift from P from JL… Wicked soundtrack! And he really wrapped it up and added a surprise which turned out to show how sweet but silly he is…it brings back memories of that perfect night….

All in all, the first two weeks of 2006 have been quite fruitful… work-filled yes, but with little nuggets of fun in between… and I do enjoy the work despite all my whining and grumbling… It’s fun dealing with my kids and I had a few successful classes with my sec 1 kids that show great promise. My Sec 3s is another story but I’ll just try harder… Miss my Sec 4s, but I do see them now and again, the cheeky terrors… However, friends have been saying I look tired and colleagues comment that I look less “fresh” compared to last year…

Looking back the past two weeks of running to and fro…somehow the days seem to mesh altogether… I always seem to tell myself the same thing and yet forget it the very next minute, to take things slower… to take each day as it comes… to count my blessings at the end of each day...

Tomorrow's just a dream away
Close the curtain on today

Concerts and stuff....

Now Playing: Every Breath You Take - Emi Fujita

*surfaces and dusts off the journal*

I am definitely not good at keeping a journal… its been 2 weeks since I’ve last updated! Darn… must work harder at this..

What’s new in the life? School started which is the major reason for the lack of updates, been dizzy running around recently busy with the CCA which did 3 shows recently, 2 for the orientation and the last which isn’t really a show but had so many darn rehearsals for a less than 3 minutes “welcome” and a less than 2 minutes finale…for 5 minutes worth of show, it took numerous rehearsals through the past 2 weeks and 2 full days down at UCC. Is it worth it? Well… all I know was I breathed a lot easier when it was all over.... there was so many nitty-gritty little things to look out for… minor ones including the fact that the lion heads must have someone looking after them at all times, there was two shows at the UCC therefore two guest-of-honors arriving and I had to make sure the lion heads only appeared after the other show guest-of-honor arrives (it didn’t help that I’m not into politics and had absolutely no idea what the minister of state looked like and had no idea who among the many vvips is the guy!). Added to all is the incessant chatter of my girls… I have a near-migraine by the time I get home each night…

My co-teacher-in-charge was laughing at me when I muttered for the darn guest-of-honor to get in the hall so I can get my boys to carry the silver cart with the enormous drum across the hall and stow it away safely for the night. Yes, carry, coz UCC is afraid that rolling it over with it rubber-soled wheels will scratch their precious marble floor... but at that point… all I wanted was for it all to be over…

Thank goodness 50 years only comes once every… erm… 50 years… hopefully the next time another 50 years rolls around, I’ll only have to turn up before the show starts and settle in comfortably to enjoy it…

Still, it’s a worthwhile experience… for the whole school to work together to put up a show, one can really feel the school spirit… like BH said… 50 years doesn’t come by easily…

And although I didn’t tell them, I’m really proud of my wushu kids… they did really well for both the wushu show in the orientation and the welcome and finale last night… I can really see the change in them… from the nervous first time they had to perform on the parade ground for the “lighting of eyes” ritual, to the poise they showed last night… I was biting my nails for fear that they’ll miss the finale cue but they came exactly on time…

They have been training almost daily since the holidays started last year and for long hours each time (I’m talking from 11am to 6pm)… I know they are tired and their parents aren’t very happy with the long hours and frequent trainings… but other than the few times they come to me and ask when their last performance is, they barely complained… they are good kids, incessant chatter and all… and the poor things will have a long time to wait before they can take a break... the upcoming show for cny is due in two weeks and after that is the Chinese Culture Fortnight...

New Year's Eve

Now Playing : Casablanca - Bertie Higgins

Went dancing last night with Nick and Adrian, had lots of fun and it was a great stress-reliever after a work-filled week. It was wonderful to see Nick again although he looks so tired… he had a work-filled holiday compared to me. Hope the 3 hours of dancing helped, we only got home after 2! Met a cousin whom I didn’t recognize, he changed so much but we did grow up together… so bad of me…I don’t meet my cousins often enough except for Jia… Perhaps we should organize another cousin outing for CNY? Hm… in addition to organizing the darn CNY celebrations itself for the school. Argh.

School started early for us ‘chers with full day seminars and meetings and before-start-of-school work this week… its also the time when our work throughout the year gets distributed…. Feeling extremely overwhelmed with the sheer workload lined up….the first half of the year looks geared for insanity. But now there’s a 3 day respite before the madness begins. Will try to get in more rest than fun for these 3 days… But going down to Union Sq for the countdown tonight again to get in more dancing after meeting Shimei for dinner :p

Watched a couple of films recently too… Caught Narnia yesterday… it’s an excellent film, gorgeous vistas and the acting was marvelous considering the child actors…and from what I remembered, it remained quite loyal to the book. It made me want to re-read the entire Narnia series…remember loving the novel when I read it as a kid..

Also watched Pride and Prejudice… now I understand why Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy are the favorite fiction couple of many of my friends. They are amazingly subtle and romantic and so snarky! Have never read the novel but its now near the top of my list.

Going to catch Letters Home tonight at the concourse… anyone else goin sms me! Also going to try to catch Merry Christmas at Cathay before school starts somehow… otherwise, the first two days of the year is looking to be quiet and relaxing… hope it’ll be a good omen for the entire year… *dreams as my outlook calendar mocks me*

August Wilson

Now Playing: Brahms Lullabye - Kenny G

When flipping open the Playbill for Altar Boyz, I was struck by the first page with line “two weeks to the day after playwright August Wilson died of cancer…”

I’m not really familiar with the works of August Wilson, having never watched any of his ten renowned long plays, but I did meet him once in Seattle in his solo autobiographical monologue, The August Wilson Project, subtitled How I learned what I learned. My major impression was the plate on the door stating that the play will run for 4 hours and 30-sth minutes which made P want to go home straightaway… it turned out to be joke on how long his plays always run.

I don’t actually remember much of the content of his monologue on his life but for bits and pieces… I remember that his life wasn’t easy and admired him of making so much out of it. I remember him as a somewhat cynical man who have seen a lot and done a lot, someone old and tough but not lacking in wit and extremely sharp. P actually remembers more details…

I didn’t know who August Wilson was when I decided to queue for the show at Seattle Rep. Theatre 2 years ago; it was more of an impulse thing… I still didn’t know who August Wilson was when we left but for the fact that this is one guy that has really lived his life… and now thinking back… I don’t think he has any regrets….

And I guess that’s all I know now about him...as a person that has really lived his life. And for that fact, I feel really lucky that we had a chance to see him and hear him share about his life… I’m glad we didn’t leave that night at seeing the plate stating that the play will run for 4 hours…

Home sweet home…

Now Playing: Silver Bells - Kenny G


Reached home and am sick… miss Boston and P terribly… miss the days of lazing around in the room with snow on the windowsills and hot tea in hand and good book on the lap… miss being able to bug P to go out and the laughter in the crisp, cold air…. Didn’t get enough of either this time with the usual two months cut down to two weeks and the days in New York…

Wrote the diary of the past few days manually during transit in Detroit and am too lazy to repeat here esp with me sniffling and coughing every few minutes… have to report to sch in awhile too…and can anyone tell I’m feeling sorry for myself? Ugh, have to snap out of this…

Having my short list of 20 Christmas songs on a loop to keep me uplifted and in a X’mas mood… miss 106.7 with their endless christmas songs...

Two weeks left of holidays… minus the days I have to go to sch, I have approx 9-8 days to myself… want to watch a few films, Narnia, Pride and Prejudice and Geisha when it comes out… anyone interested call me…

Snow

Now Playing: Seasons of Love - Original Broadway Cast

Happy, wonderful snowy day today….

Woke up to a snow-covered Boston…went out to find that its still snowing, light and steady snow that covered the ground rapidly… When we got out of the T, the snow was getting icier and we wondered if its going to snow the whole day…

Watched Rent, the film version. It was as fabulous as the musical itself… they cut some parts but somehow, the real-life shots of Ave A itself, the iron-cast building Mark and Roger stayed in, the subway and the nightclub Mimi danced in… everything made the entire telling more coherent and realistic than the musical….not to say that that the film version is better thou.. they both have their qualities…loved Mark’s film at the end. Its what I missed seeing in the musical. It made for a very good conclusion of the show… and Mimi was gorgeous!

Emerged from the show to discover that the snow has actually gotten heavier! Huge flakes of the snow falling over Boston Common and its really gigantic flakes… we can see crystal designs..… It was stunning, the Christmas lights twined in the trees sparkling through the crystal flakes… We originally wanted to walk to the library but decided to opt for taking the T instead….Trinity looked like a snow-covered cottage through the blurred snowy view….…

Had a good haul in the library… even found a book on a shelf that I was on reserve for… althou what is it doing on the shelf when I already reserved it several weeks earlier is anyone’s guess…. I did a twirl on the lobby while waiting for the books and the librarian laughed and said that the snow is making me so happy that I’m dancing! Well, books and snow are always an intoxicating mix for me : )

We went to Copley Mall for lunch at the sushi bar and a spot of window shopping… originally wanted to adjust the bracelet P got for me for X’mas but discovered that there’s a 2 week wait… decide to wear it by hooking it through one of the loops instead… by now, there’s a wind to contend with together with the snow…. In the trek from the library to the mall, I can literally feel the icy chips striking at my face… it hurts like a blizzard! The roads are all covered and one can barely see the steps up to the library… We came out all frosted like an icing cake and I was laughing the whole time… its so fun :)

Went to the Coop to buy a couple of books that I wanted to get for the flight home… Wicked by Maguire and Brokeback Mountain… By now, the snow have cleared and the air was crystal clear… the scenery seems extra-defined, the silver-tipped trees and pristine powder-laden pathways and lawns…and a beautifully soft rose-gold sunset in the distance even though its barely 4pm…

Topped it all off with a warm bath, which after a freezing day is absolute bliss…

Film, music, books, snow, sushi, warmth and P by my side through it all… all my favorite things in the world…it’s a wonderful Christmas…

p/s: just discovered that the national weather service in taunton issued a winter storm warning of a snowfall of 6 or more inches for a 12-hour period from sunrise onwards..."anyone planning travel should monitor later forecasts and be prepared to modify travel plans"... guess we were too late for that *grins*

New York, New York

Juz came back from 3 days in New York. As my brother was there... it was 3 art-filled days...

Spent the first day in MoMA where I was mesmerized by Monet's triptych and Pollack's huge drip-art painting. Also saw a number of paintings that I've only heard of before.. Dali's Persistence of Memory, Van Gogh's Starry Night... There was also an amazing photograph gallery. It snowed at night when we were at West 4th...

2nd day was back to Chelsea's art galleries. There was a collection called Liquidation that I fell in love with... the dreamy landscapes and secretive trees... If I have the money... I'll definitely buy at least 2-3 of the works... We split up to different shows at night and I went to Altar Boyz, an off-broadway production that had all its audience in stitches. It was great fun althou I felt it could have gone deeper. But the songs were wonderful and it had a lot of heart in it. They got a standing ovation and the entire theatre setting was very intimate which is what I liked. For a TKTS ticket, I sat 3rd row centre which was unbelievable luck by itself. The theatre itself left an impression. Its the same theatre we watched Naked Boys Singing in, but I didn't notice it at that time. Its a cineplex converted into a 5-theatre ...erm.. theatreplex? Quite unique in a sense and thus all the theatres are quite small.

3rd day morning was spent wandering around the snow-covered Central Park while my brother searched for the elusive Bethesda fountain. We started from our hostel st. at 106th and walked by the Conservatory and North Meadows which is a area I've never explored before. Spent approx 2 hours simply crossing from one point to another... after which I left for my play while they went off to the Met.

Watched Seascape by Edward Albee...It was a very deep play with a veneer of comedy... I originally thought it was about the relationship between an old couple, the quirks and the way they live and think together... however, when the lizards appear, everything took on a different dimension. It turned out to be about evolution instead... but it still seems to be able to play another way... Went to Albee's Q&A session at the Lincoln at 630 and after hearing his piece and seeing the way he answer questions... I came out with more questions than answers... Its a really interesting play. For a play written 30 years back, its still very much related to the current day situations... or perhaps its becoz people never really changes...

Had some time in between before I was to meet my mom and brother for the Wicked lottery, so I went to the library... took some time to walk through the Christmas Fair at Bryant Park which really gets one into the X'mas spirit. All the red and green and white tents done up in sparkling lights and twines... the little trinkets... There was a couple of exhibitions in the library as well to take up my time and Astor Hall was simply beautiful... a huge Christmas Tree with all the golden light reflecting off the marbled halls and steps...

Left the library slightly late and did a 10 block sprint from the 40th and 5th to the 50th and 8th in order to make it for the lottery which of coz we didn't win... argh. But In My Life cancelled on us so we'll try for the cancellation line on our last night in New York..

Anyway, one amazing piece of news... was on a search for this cosy restaurant on the Upper West Side...above 63rd... that P and I went to on our first trip to NYC. Remembered it had a fireplace and the food was delicious... I always thought that I read about it in my trusty DK guide but after a couple of searches, I could never find it. Spent almost an hour trawling up and down between 69th to 71st yest. afternoon with no luck. I almost gave up and thought it a lost cause. But yesterday night, mom and I left Lincoln for dinner and was just walking up Colombus planning to stop at the first promising restaurant, I actually saw it! W 68th St.! I almost couldn't believe my eyes! And the place is still the same with the roaring fireplace and we were sat right back at the same table. The dinner menu isn't as good as the brunch menu we ate the first time but the smoked salmon is still delicious. I'm so happy that I found it again :)

Was almost late for my 10pm bus at Chinatown.. did a sprint down Canel St (I seem to be running everywhere yesterday) and just made it in time. Left at 10pm and reached Boston at 2am... Slept through most of the trip...

And now its the first lazy day I've had in weeks... woke up at 12 and cooked lunch with P and JL... going to spend the day doing absolutely nothing....

Back and Gone..

Now Playing: 珊瑚海 - 周杰伦

Touched down this morning at 6am, but was delayed at the airport due to my dear student who left her passport in the magazine pocket of the plane… haiz. Blur like sotong... but she’s a sweet girl that reminds me a lot of myself. That’s something I would do when I was young too, I remember leaving my diary which was never recovered in the exact same place when I was twelve… She supposedly looks a lot like me too! Rendy kept telling me that a girl in his class resembles me and apparently its her.

The 6 day trip is full of little details that are swimming around my mind now… my first experience of being in charge of students overseas… too many to say so I’ll probably end up not saying anything… kinda miss my dear kids that are very guai but never shut up… the bus journey filled with laughter and songs and lame jokes and non-understandable games…

Met kq for dinner one night at Wu Dao Kou that looks nothing like the Wu Dao Kou I remember… wanted to go Yu Tai Lang but he recommended another Jap place with half price for sushi, it isn’t anything like the jap places that I remember but the food was delicious and we went to Sculpting in Time Wu Dao Kou’s branch for cake and tea. Yes, Diao Ke has a branch in WDK and also god-knows-where around Beijing… remember the times when there was only one branch and the afternoons I spent there staring out of the window with my work in front of me and a jug of lavender tea…. This new branch looks exactly like the Diao Ke I remember…

The Ps and Heads knew I wanted to go back to PKU for a visit so they arranged it that I could join the Beida Fuzhong group on the afternoon of the PKU tour as I was actually in charge of the Shida Fuzhong group… they are really nice pple and took great care of me when I was there… the campus was still the same… from Weimin to Wumei… I wanted to go back to Weimin at night…. But didn’t get a chance…

Met Lin in the afternoon for chestnuts. Heard so many good things about it that I had quite high expectations. It was pretty good although the first part had way too many star wars and it was a little too pink. But I loved the Rent spoofs and the past year theatre review which summed up the local theatre year scene pretty well. It’s a good way to end the year and both Jon Lim and Hossan Leong are quality humorists.

And now… to pack and bath before I have to run for another flight…and my dear brother only just got home. He was attending a full day film workshop of some sorts for the past few days and has yet to pack as well (althou he did win some film competition of sorts)….it’ll be a rush for time for the next few hours….